Count On Me
by Adrian Jade
Summary: One bad choice causes devastation. But that same choice also gave someone the greatest gift ever to be received.
1. Chapter 1

_Title: Count on Me_

_Author: Adrian Jade_

_Summary: One bad choice causes devastation. But that same choice also gave someone the greatest gift ever to be received._

_Prologue: _

_May 8, 2009_

"_You're going to make it through this baby." Elaine Langston stroked her daughter's damp forehead. "You are going to be ok." She brought her lips down to kiss the pale clammy skin. Whitney coughed and Elaine could see the vapors hitting the clear oxygen mask her daughter was forced to wear. Whitney had been born perfect. A beautifully perfect 8 pound baby. Then when she was twelve years old she developed kidney problems. Then at twenty-three her heart began to fail. She was now twenty-seven and fading before her mother's eyes. She needed a new heart and was one of the top names on the transplant list. But they were running out of time. Whitney wouldn't survive another month without a new heart. Elaine could feel the desperation deep within her but she never let her only daughter see it. No, instead she was always hopeful around her daughter. She needed to be her rock. But the moment she left the hospital which had become her second home she let the stone wall she kept around her heart crumble and she wept for her daughter. Whitney needed a heart and she needed it now._

_-- _

"_Mia stay with me." John Cena hurried to keep up with the moving stretcher that his fiancée way being wheel away from him on. His white dress shirt was covered in blood. None of it his own. The small gash on his forehead was the only indication that something had happened to him. Mia's side of the car had been the one to sustain the major impact of the other car. He hadn't had that much to drink. Just a few beers. He had sworn the light had been green. The medical personal stopped him from going any further. If something happened to her he would never forgive himself. He slumped down to the floor and put his head in his hands and sobbed._

_Everything was a blur after that. Nothing seemed to make much sense to his numb mind. His brain had turned itself onto safe mode to protect him. He was aware of what was going on and what had happened but to him it was almost like a dream._

_Mia Underwood never regained consciousness that night. At exactly 2:48 A.M. she was declared clinically brain dead. As her last dying wish her organs were donated to people who needed them. _


	2. Chapter 2

One Year Later...

"How are you feeling today sweetie?" Elaine asked her daughter. She kissed the top of her head. Whitney grimaced, she was almost thirty years old and he mother still treated her as if she was a toddler.

"I'm fine. I swear" The younger woman replied with a sigh. The over protective thing was getting old really fast.

"So have you thought anymore about getting a job?" Elaine hadn't wanted to be so direct but with all the medical bills Whitney had racked up things had been very tight financially.

"I've been looking mom. But it's hard to find one at the moment. I'm gonna go to the store you want anything?"

"No, I'm fine."

She strolled into the corner market. As she did everyday at the same time. It was really the only time her mother let her out of the house anymore. She was ever so persistent about getting a job yet she was afraid to let Whitney walk down the street.

"Hey Sean." She greeted the young man behind the counter with a huge smile. Sean Cena was a nice guy. He had tried hitting on her a couple of time but she wasn't really feeling it so he settled on being her friend.

"Hey Whit." He returned her smile with one of his own. "How's the job search comin?"

She rolled her eyes. "Not well." She placed the few groceries she had picked out for tonight's dinner on the counter. He rang in the stuff. He opened his mouth to say something but then frowned and shook his head.

"What is it Sean?" Whitney asked perplexed by his sudden reluctance to talk to her. Her brown furrowed as she studied the younger man carefully. He looked to be having an inner battle with himself.

"You know how my brother John is a wrestler right?" He asked. Of course she did. Who hadn't heard of John Cena? "Well he is looking for a personal assistant to keep his schedule in check. What with all the appearances he does." Sean rolled his eyes.

"So ... why were you so afraid of telling me that?" she countered.

"Well John isn't the easiest person to deal with." He advised her. "He's very withdrawn and bitter towards the world. He's been through a lot this year and he doesn't want to admit that he needs help. You seem like a nice girl who needs a little help supporting your family. But I dunno if sticking John on you would be a good idea. I love my brother but he is a miserable bastard."

"I'm sure he can't be that bad." She gave him a shy grin. "If he is as charming as you are I'm sure I'd do fine."

Sean's skin blanched slightly. "I'll give him a call if you'd like." He offered.

"Don't go out of your way on my account. But if you happen to call your brother and it comes up then hey feel free to mention me. I don't want you to think I am not appreciative but I also kinda don't want to be pitied either."

"I could never pity you." Sean let out a deep chuckle. "You'd kick my ass if I did. That will be fifteen fifty by the way." She paid the young man and began her trek back to her home. Maybe things were starting to look up. This could be the step in the right direction she needed to begin rebuilding her life. But she was not one to count on anything until it happened. Time would tell.

--

"Hey big brother it is good to hear your voice." Sean began to butter his older brother up.

"What do you want?" his older and very impatient brother asked. He knew Sean well enough to know when he wanted something.

"Well I know Mr. McMahon wants you to hire a PA and I have the perfect girl in mind." He waited for his brother to begin protesting that he didn't need any help.

"I don't need a damn PA." Sean grinned. He knew his brother like the back of his hand.

"Well according to the man who makes sure you get paid you do. She's a friend of mine and she could really use a job." Sean wasn't above begging.

"If she is a friend of yours then definitely not!" John put his foot down. "I've met some of your friends and I wouldn't trust them to walk my dog."

"Please John." Sean was beginning to get desperate. He really wanted to do something nice for Whitney. "Just give her a shot. I know you will love her."

"I highly doubt that." He sighed and ran a hand through his shortly cropped hair. "But I will give her a chance because you are my brother."

"Thanks John. I swear you will no regret this."

"I already do." The older man mumbled hanging up his phone. This was not going to be good. He could feel it already. He rubbed his temples to relieve the headache he felt coming on. The last thing he needed right now was to deal with one of Sean's female friends. Or a female in general.


	3. Chapter 3

Although Whitney would never admit it out loud she was incredibly nervous about meeting her friend's brother. She had heard Sean talk about his brother numerous times but she had never actually gotten around to meeting him. She often felt bad that Sean would tell her about his life and his family but she was still very secretive with him. She would not tell anyone about her transplant or the fact that she had a huge scar on her chest. She could barely look at herself in the mirror. To her it was hideous; she refused to wear anything that would allow people to see it. It had healed and slowly faded away but she still felt that people would stare and find her the circus sideshow she thought she was.

"This is the start of a whole new life." She coached herself. In her hands was the letter that she had written after she had woken up from her surgery. It was to her donor's fiancée. It was basically telling him how sorry she was for his loss. But at the same time she wanted to thank him and her donor for giving her a second chance at life. A life she now refused to take for granted. Maybe that was why she had agreed to meet with Sean's brother. The man traveled all over the world, a good enough excuse to get her out there and see the world. She had never really left her small town of Groveland, Massachusetts. She dropped the letter into the mailbox and walked over to her parked car.

"I hope JC knows how hard that was for me." She frowned for a moment. They would not allow her to know his true identity so all she knew were his initials. Mr. JC is what she had addressed her letter to. She got into her car and headed for Jersey.

She was meeting her "new employer" in East Rutherford, New Jersey. Which was close to a five hour drive from where she lived. But she didn't mind too much it would give her time to think about things. Like what she would answer if he asked why she needed this job so badly. Or if he asked why there was such a great distance between her jobs on her resume. She supposed she could tell him that she had been sick, but that would draw some unwanted and unneeded questions. No, she would not tell him that. She tried her best to clear her thoughts and let the music she was listening to calm her. Pretty soon she

found herself singing along to the songs she knew. If felt good to feel almost normal again.

--

She found out fast that she was not a fan of long car trips. Three hours into the drive she began to get utterly bored. The only thing that made this trip not so bad was the fact that she had promised herself to visit Asbury Park before she left Jersey. Her cell phone rang. She answered it and rolled her eyes because it was Sean.

"Good luck kiddo."

"Thanks I'm gonna need it."

A/N: I wish I could write more today but things were kinda screwy today. R.I.P. Michael Scott Zarba. You were the inspiration for this.


	4. Chapter 4

She wanted to make a good impression. She had spent the last of her very limited savings to buy a business suit. Sean had given her very little insight into his older brother. He just wished her good luck and sent her on her way. She was meeting him at his hotel. She walked into the building with as much confidence as she could muster. She walked with a purpose. She was going to charm the pants off of John Cena, for lack of a better term.

"Excuse me." She said politely to receptionist. The woman whom was about five foot in stature looked at Whitney with contempt.

"May I help you?" she asked like she had anything better in the world to do than talk to her.

"I'm supposed to be meeting Mr. John Cena." Whitney stated her purpose. She tried to keep her knees from buckling as she said his name.

"Mr. Cena left this note for you I guess." The woman practically whipped the piece of paper at her.

On the small piece of lined paper. There was scrawled writing saying meet me in the bar. She ventured over to the bar. It wasn't too hard to find. He was even easier to find seeing as he was the only person in the bar.

"Mr. Cena." She gently tapped his shoulder. He turned his head a little to look at her. He seemed to be appraising her. His look made her a little uncomfortable.

"Have a seat." His tone was a little rougher than either of them would have liked. She did what was asked of her. "Something to drink Ms.?" The bartender asked.

"Water please?"

"Don't drink?" he asked.

The truth was she was still on a lot of medication for her heart and she wasn't allowed to drink. She shrugged. "Not a big drinker." Half the truth worked too.

"Probably better that way." He seemed bored now. He took another sip of his beer.

"So what makes you think you can be my personal assistant … blah blah blah … all that shit that I am supposed to ask." He wouldn't even look at her to answer.

"I'm very organized. I work well under pressure." She stopped explaining. She took a deep breathe. "And I could really use this job." He looked at her then.

Finally a little bit of honesty. He could respect that. He himself had once been in need of financial support. He thought to himself as he took another sip of his beer. He was looking straight ahead but he couldn't really see anything. His mind wasn't in that bar with him. His mind wasn't ever with him anymore. Every time he closed his eyes he saw nothing but darkness and then a sudden boom with shake his entire being. Then the next thing he knew he was standing in an emergency room with blood all over his shirt. Blood that wasn't his.

"You're hired." He abruptly said. "Don't screw things up." He stood and threw some money on the bar. Leaving her alone and completely confused at what had just happened.

A/N: It wasn't as long as I hoped it would be but I think it gives good insight on John's frame of mind and his emotional turmoil.


	5. Chapter 5

"See I knew John would like you." Sean spoke smugly after she had told him she had received the job.

"Like isn't exactly the world I would use. It's more like he hates me less than he does other people."

"Just give him some time." Sean urged her. "Once you get through the miserable bastard layer is a really sweet and caring guy."

"So what happened to him to make him the way he is?" Whitney asked curiously.

"That's something for him to fill you in on. But I wouldn't come right out and ask him because he would probably get mad at you."

"I gotta go. Your brother has a taping for Conan tonight so I have to go make sure he is ready." Whitney said.

"Ok and remember under the miserable layer is a much more likeable one."

"Ok I will remember that." She hung up her phone. She stood up from her hotel room bed and left her room. John's room was the one right next to hers. She walked the mere inches to his door and knocked. After a few moments he came to the door. He was shirtless with a toothbrush hanging out of his mouth. He shook his head and closed the door once again. She frowned and was about to knock again when he opened the door once again.

"Yes?" he asked impatiently.

"We have to get going if you want to be on time for your appearance on The Tonight Show." She reminded him.

"Dammit! Gimme a second." He grabbed his duffel bag and slung it over his shoulder. "Let's go." He walked briskly past her. "You get the transportation?"

"Yes. There is a limo waiting out in the front of the hotel. It is going to get us to the building just in time for you to hit hair and make up before the taping starts."

"Ok." He seemed a little impressed. Usually he had to do all this stuff himself. It was kind of nice not to have to worry about getting from point A to point B. "What about the flight out?"

"Five AM flight to Calgary. Then you have an autograph signing at ten and have to be at the arena by two for a staff meeting. I will personally be showing up at your room at three-thirty to make sure you are up on time. I do not believe in wake up calls."

"You seem to be taking this PA thing very seriously." He observed.

"I believe it was you who told me not to screw up." She reminded him.

"Yea … sorry about that. It wasn't my intention to come off as rude as I did. It's been a difficult time for me."

"Sean mentioned as much but he never mentioned what had happened so please don't be mad at him."

"So are you and my brother like dating or something?" John asked. He had to admit he was just the slightest bit curious why Sean would take such personal interest in someone who was just simply a friend.

"No, Sean is a sweetheart but I do not date." She stated simply. "My life is way too complicated to let down my defenses long enough to let someone inside."

"Amen to that." That was the end of their conversation. The traveled together in silence. John filmed what he needed to and they headed back to the hotel. They went their separate ways for the night.

Whitney awoke at three AM. She showered and dressed quickly. She was finished getting ready promptly at three-twenty nine. She opened her door but stopped. There her employer was passed out in the middle of the hallway.

"This is definitely not what I signed up for." She knelt down so that she was his level and shook him. He groaned but refused to move.

"Please Mr. Cena we are going to miss our flight." She pleaded with the man. He opened his eyes a little.

"Mia … let me sleep a little longer baby." He mumbled sleepily.

"Who's Mia?" A woman's voice filled his ears. But it wasn't hers. It was enough to force him out of his sleepy haze. The eyes he was looking into weren't the honey brown ones he so longed to see. They were just as concerned as Mia's would have been.

"Are you alright?" Whitney asked. "You didn't hit your head or anything right? Nobody did this to you?"

"I'm fine." John tried to stand up but his legs were extremely wobbly. She placed his arm across her shoulders and did her best to support his weight as she tried to get him into his room. He handed her his key card and she walked him straight into the shower.

She turned the shower on for him. "Take your clothes off once you are in the shower." She instructed him laying a clean towel on the closed toilet seat.

Next she busied herself with picking out an outfit for him and laying it on his bed. She also placed a glass of water and a few aspirin on the night stand. Lord knows he would need them.

She waited for him in the living room of his hotel suite. He emerged fully dressed about fifteen minutes later. On his face was an almost shamed expression.

"Happens to the best of us." Was all she said to him before going to retrieve his wet clothes.

He stood there awed but the fact that she had not even bothered to judge him for his less that acceptable behavior. She returned with his duffle bag in hand.

"If we head out now I will buy you a doughnut." She promised him.

"You don't have to."

"It's better for you to have a little food in your stomach. I can only imagine how much you drank last night. I know, I have been there." It was true. The moment she found out her heart was failing her she began drinking herself to death. She figured if she was going to die anyways she might as well out of having fun.

"You don't have to take care of me you know. It's not your job."

"True … but if you drink yourself to death then I don't get paid. So it is more profitable for me to keep you alive." There was a huge smile on her face as she said what she said. Tipping John off that she was joking. He let out a low chuckle.

It had been a while since he had done so and the sound seemed strange to his ears. She could now see a little of what Sean had been taking about.

"You are a lot handsomer when you smile." She commented. "That is a strictly professional comment of course."

"Yea … whatever you say." Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. He was nowhere close to being ok but maybe it wouldn't be so much like hell with someone who was being paid to be with him. He knew she was only being nice to him for the money but that seemed to work for him. It was better for him that way.


	6. Chapter 6

Whitney was eating breakfast in the hotel restaurant the following morning when two very attractive women sat across from her in the two empty chairs at her table. One was a blonde, the other a brunette.

"So you must be John's new PA." The brunette asked.

"Yes, that's me." Whitney replied not really paying either woman much mind.

"We are his best friends and as such we have the right to get to know you and make sure you are the right type of person for the job."

"If you ladies don't mind I neither care nor do I want to care about what you think of me. All I care about is that I get Mr. Cena from point A to point B with no major disasters."

Both of John's friends looked at each other. They were impressed that this new chick had a backbone.

"I'm Mickie James, John's best friend and this is Maria."

"Were you the same friends who left him passed out in front of my hotel room door this morning? Because if you were then you are doing a crack job being his friends. It's obvious that the man has a drinking problem and he is well for a lack of a better term drinking himself stupid."

"Look ... John has had a very hard year." Mickie defended her friend.

"Yea ... yea so I've heard but nobody wants to elaborate. So have the rest of us. Some people thank the lord to have the hardships because that means that they are still alive."

Mickie narrowed her eyes. "I think I might just end up liking you." She said before breaking into a smile.

"Excuse me ..." Whitney was caught off guard.

"Your attitude. It's healthy for John to have someone who has a no BS attitude around to keep him in line. Mia was like that." Maria's eyes went wide and Mickie's hand flew to her mouth after she realized what she had said.

"Mia?" Whitney questioned. "Who's Mia?"

"Forget about it. It's not important now."

But Whitney would not be able to forget it. The looks on their faces after Mickie mentioned the Mia woman's name made Whitney way too curious.

"I gotta go but it was nice meeting the two of you." Whitney left some money on the table for her food.

"Nice going." Maria said as Mickie put her face in her hands.

"He's gonna kill me isn't he?"

"Uh huh."

--

Luckily there was a local library down the street from where they were staying. Whitney hopped on one of the computers. She typed John Cena tragedy into Google.

_Woman Killed In Car Accident, Famous Boyfriend Under The Influence At The Time_

_WWE superstar John Cena and his fiancée Mia Underwood were on their way home after a night of partying when an SUV swerved into their lane. Cena did not have the time to swerve out of the way at the time and the SUV hit the car they were in head on. Mr. Cena's blood alcohol level was at the legal limit but the question is could Ms. Underwood have been spared?_

_--_

Whitney sat in the living room of her suite pretending to watch television. John had an adjoining room.

"Hey" He said as he walked into the room.

"Hi." Whitney replied uneasily.

"What's the matter? You seem different."

She thought about whether or not she should tell him what she knew. She figured that it would be better to be honest. He might not like what she was saying but at least he would know that she was and honest person.

He had gone to her fridge and grabbed a bottle of water. "I know about Mia." She blurted out. He turned slowly on his heels and glared at her.

"What did you just say?" his voice no longer had the light easiness it had before.

"I said I know about Mia." She repeated slowly. "I kinda googled you and that was the first thing on the search engine."

"Get out!"

"John ..."

"Out" He commanded.

She nodded. It sucked but she understood. She left him alone in the room to pack her stuff. She returned with her bags slung over her shoulder. He had not moved from the spot her had been in. She walked past him towards the door. Her hand was on the door knob.

"Don't go." He whispered. It was so low she had barely heard it.

"If I stay there will be some serious changes. No more drinking yourself into a stupor for one."

"Done."

"Also you need to talk to someone about your grief. It's the only way you are going to begin to heal."

"I am not talking to someone." He argued.

"Ok then ... bye."

"Fine." He growled. "But this is the one and only time you can blackmail me like this."

"You'll thank me one day."

"I highly doubt it. You are lucky you are good at keeping my schedule organized."

"Aww ... you almost care."


	7. Chapter 7

"Whitney wait up a second ..." Mickie jogged up to her with ease. Whitney gave the young woman a small smile. "Why didn't you tell John I was the one who mentioned Mia's name? You made it sound like you stumbled across it by accident."

"I dunno ... I didn't want you to get into trouble I guess. Tell ya the truth I wasn't thinking about anything but letting him know that I knew at the time."

"See I knew I was going to like you. How about you hang out with us tonight. If John isn't going to help you meet people then I will."

"Mickie that is nice of you but ... I don't think that is such a good idea. I don't think I would fit in with your crowd."

"You'll do fine." Mickie assured her. She was not going to take no for an answer. "Besides what better way to keep tabs on John then to be with him and his friends. Also it gives you a chance to meet people. I mean who do you really know besides John and me?"

"I met Maria the other day when you two ambushed me." Whitney pointed out.

"Not a very convincing argument." Mickie laughed.

"I have no going out clothes." Whitney knew that that excuse was not going to get her anywhere but she figured it was worth a shot.

"You look to be about the same size as me and Maria and believe me we have tons of clothes." Mickie began pulling Whitney towards the room she and Maria were sharing. "Ria ... Whitney is going to rummage through your clothes so she has something to wear tonight." Mickie shouted to the blonde diva, who was in the shower.

"YAY! New clubbing buddy." Both women heard Maria yell back.

"Well go ahead and pick from the disaster area that is this room." Mickie gestured all around them where clothes were haphazardly thrown.

"How do you guys live like this?" Whitney asked.

"It's easy once you come over to the dark side." Mickie laughed.

"What's so funny?" Maria came strolling out of the shower in nothing but her underwear and bra. Whitney made a face.

"Believe me you get used to it." Mickie advised her. Both to the earlier question and also to Maria's less than fully clothed state.

"I think you would look hot in these leather pants." Maria said holding up said pants.

"I have the perfect shirt to go with those pants!" Mickie clapped excitedly as she searched for the shirt. "Here it is ..."

"You guys really don't have to." Whitney tried.

"Are you kidding this is fun for us." Maria said. "Now go to your room and shower and we will be waiting to beautify you."

"Fine." Whitney sighed. She knew it was hopeless trying to get out of going out.

She trudged back to her room and headed for the shower. She still had no idea why Mickie and Maria wanted to be friends with her. She had been incredibly rude to them when they first met but that seemed to make them like her more.

"Whenever you get out we are all set up." Mickie said stepping into the bathroom. "Don't mind me I am just looking through the make up you have." Whitney was a little alarmed at the fact that another person was in the bathroom while she was taking a shower. Another female to add insult to injury.

"Umm ... Whitney what's with all these bottles of pills?" Mickie asked, her tone a little accusing.

"Shit!"

"You aren't like some kind of addict are you?"

Whitney continued to ramble off curse words. "Close the door. I am going to show you something. But it cannot leave this room. Nobody but my mother knows." Mickie did what was asked of her. She waited patiently on the closed toilet seat. Whitney shut the hot water off and grabbed a towel. She wrapped it around herself while still in the shower and stepped out. "Come closer."

Mickie stepped cautiously over to the woman. Her eyes slightly distrustful. When she was close enough Whitney pulled down her towel ever so slightly. Mickie could clearly see the faded scar that ran the length of her new friend's chest.

"About a year ago I was dying. My heart was failing me and the only way I would survive was if I got a new heart. I should have died on the eight day of May last year but I didn't. By some miracle some other person died so I could have their heart. All those pills you see lining the bathroom counter … I have to take those everyday to keep my body from rejecting my new heart."

"Why are you telling me this?" Mickie asked shocked at the force of what she had just been told. "For the same reason I did not tell John that you lead me to Mia. It's a trust thing. Now you know that you can trust me and I am seeing if I can trust you. That and it feels so damn good to be able to talk to someone other than my mom about it."

"What day did you say you received your heart?" she asked.

"I think it was around five am on the ninth. The nurses told me my donor had passed away in a hospital near where I was."

"Where are you from?"

"Believe it or not I am from the same town John is. That's how I got the job. I'm friends with his youngest brother Sean."

"Ok … well go get dressed so me and Maria can make you beautiful." Mickie tried to put on her best smile.

--

Whitney gazed at herself in the full length mirror. Maria had been right, the leather pants hugged her legs in just the right way. The top Mickie had leant her made her feel a little uncomfortable because it was loose and Whitney was convinced that people would be able to see her scar. But Mickie pushed those fears out of her mind. They had curled her hair and left it to fall to the middle of her back. Little make up was applied because Mickie said there was no need. Whitney was one of those natural beauties who had little need for tons and tons of makeup.

"You look hot mamacita." Maria appraised her new friend.

"I feel ridiculous." Whitney frowned.

"You'll do fine." Mickie assured her. "Who knows maybe you will get lucky."

"I hardly doubt that." Whitney said. "Especially since I don't want anyone to know about my little secret." She whispered furiously into Mickie's ear.

"Oh relax a little." She whispered back.

They were meeting the rest of their group down in the lobby. The group was relatively small. Besides John there were two other men and three women. John seemed to perk up just the slightest bit when he saw that Whitney was joining them. The slight change in his body language did not go unnoticed by Mickie.

"Whit … this is Randy Orton and our Smackdown buddy Matt Hardy. And these lovely ladies are mine and Maria's fellow Diva Gail Kim and our retired friends Trish and Amy Dumas. You obviously know John already."

"It's nice to meet everyone." Whitney said shyly.

She received a round of greetings back. Maria, Randy, Matt, Gail, Trish, and Amy all piled into Matt's rented truck. Leaving John and Mickie and Whitney on their own. Mickie took the backseat. Whitney wanted to sit with her but Mickie glared at her and gestured her head towards the passenger seat. Sulking slightly she slipped into the passenger seat.

"So what made you decide to come out tonight?" John asked pulling the car into gear.

"What better way to keep an eye on you." She joked back at him. "In all actuality Mickie wouldn't take no for an answer."

"Yep, sounds like her." John looked at Mickie in the rear view mirror. Mickie swore she could see the old light that John used to have in his eyes back. The one that she thought she would never see again.

Mickie made a mental note that she liked John and Whitney together and if in fact Whitney did have Mia's heart then it was fate.

--

"Why aren't you out making a fool out of yourself like everyone else?" John asked sliding into a booth next to Whitney. She had been watching everyone.

"Unfortunately I don't have the liquid courage they do." She laughed.

"Alcoholic?" he asked.

"Something like that ... but it was another lifetime ago."

"Well for what it is worth I'm glad you came out tonight. It makes keeping my promise easier."

"How many is that?" She asked pointing to the beer he had in his hand.

"Two." He replied.

"Good boy." She patted him on the top of the head in a condescending manner.

--

But old habits die hard. John ended up breaking his promise. Whitney, against the orders of her doctors lugged the two hundred and fifty pound man into the hotel elevator and then halfway down a long hallway to his room. She got him to sit down on his bed and managed to remove his shoes. She helped him lay down and then tucked him in.

"Whitney ... please stay with me." He begged her.

Even though she was furious beyond belief with him she couldn't leave him alone after he had asked her not to.

"I'll be right back." She went to her own room and changed and did all her night time rituals before returning to John's room. "I'm going to be on the couch if you need me."

"You can sleep in the bed with me. It's more comfortable." She knew he was right. She laid down next to him on top of the covers.

"G'nite Whitney."

"Sweet dreams John."

A/N: Ok my loyal reviewers this will be my last update for a while. I am taking some time off to take the twins on vacation and then we'll see when I get back.


	8. Chapter 8

The Miz sat quietly at a table in catering. Maria and Mickie took the seats on either side of him. They were on a mission. Although Maria had no idea what that mission was she was intent on helping if she could.

"Hey Mike." Mickie gave the young man a huge smile.

"What do you want from me Mickie?" Miz asked knowing this conversation was somehow going to cost him.

"You are pretty good with computers right?" Mickie asked casually. She was pretending not to be as interested as she really was.

"Yea ..." Miz was slightly uneasy.

"Well we need to find records ... records that might not exactly be legal to obtain." Miz's unease tripled.

"What do you need?" He asked. But something in his gut told him that he didn't want to know.

"You remember John's fiancée Mia right?"

"Yea. I remember her." Miz confirmed. "Shame she had to die the way she did. But what does this have to do with her?"

"We need to find out who received her organs. There has to be some records somewhere."

"Why do you need to know who got her organs?" Miz asked. His curiosity took over his previous feeling of unease.

"That isn't important right now. Can you find me what I need?" She was starting to get impatient. If Miz couldn't help her then there was no need to waste her time even talking to him.

"Yes, gimme a few hours and I should have something for you."

Her smile returned. "Thank you Mike. I promise that all will be revealed in due time." She stood up and pushed her chair in. Maria followed suit.

"Why are you snooping around Mia's medical stuff?" Maria asked.

"I can't tell you right now. I promised."

"Ok I guess I can understand that." Maria relented. She wasn't going to make Mickie go back on a promise.

"I am gonna go see how Whitney fared with John. I will catch up with you at the arena later on." The two divas parted ways.

--

Whitney was practicing her yoga when she heard a knock on her door. "Come in its open." She yelled. Mickie walked into the room to find Whitney with one leg stretched over her head.

"Interesting position you got goin on there." Mickie's eyes shone with amusement. "You should really show your boss that one."

"Shut up." Whitney remarked as she finished her stretch.

Mickie became serious. She had a seat on the couch. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure. Go right ahead."

"When you have to get a transplant do they tell you who the donor is?" Mickie asked.

"No. Usually the family wants to keep that stuff private. But if the recipient would like to send the family a letter they give you an address. For example I got my donor's fiancée's address."

"Fiancée huh?"

"Yea ... why do you ask?"

"Just kinda curious about how something like that works." It wasn't a lie she was telling. It was simply omitting the some parts of the truth. "Why don't you tell more people about it?"

"Well I guess I don't want them to treat me like a freak. Or pity me ... or spend all their time worrying whether or not I am ok. I am ok I take my pills and my new heart keeps beating. Besides it is really not anyone's business but my own."

"I guess I can understand that. Must be frustrating though, living with something like that."

"Sometimes it is nearly impossible but I always manage."

"So what happens if you meet a guy who you fall in love with? Eventually you will have to tell them about it."

"I guess I will cross that bridge when I come to it. But for right now the less people to know the better."

--

John walked into Whitney's room. Mickie was sitting on her couch and she was throwing clothing into her duffle bag. He remembered what she had said to him. He had told her he would not drink as much and he had screwed that up.

"Whitney I'm sorry. I know that I told you and that I broke my word but please don't leave." He gently grabbed her arm so that she could not throw anymore clothing into her bag. Both Whitney and Mickie looked at him confused.

"Ok ... let's start this whole conversation over." Whitney pulled her arm from his grip. "Hi John. I am packing my clothes up so I can do some laundry down the street at the laundry mat."

"Oh." His face reddened a little. He now felt foolish for jumping to conclusions.

"When did you become so clingy?" Mickie asked.

"Shut up." John retorted.

"So anyways Whitney and I are gonna do laundry and then get something to eat." Mickie announced. "Want anything."

"Where you gonna eat?"

"Probably McDonalds" Mickie shrugged.

"Get me my usual."

"Yes your majesty." Mickie rolled her eyes.

"Ready?" Mickie asked.

"Yep." Whitney slung her bag over her shoulder. "See ya later John. Don't forget autograph signing tomorrow morning. Then you have a make a wish meeting at three."

--

"I think John is totally into you." Mickie teased her new friend as they folded clothes.

"It isn't like that at all. He just simply likes that I keep his schedule so organized and it keeps him from having to worry about it." Whitney scoffed.

"Believe me Whit ... I have known John for a while and I have not seen him this alive since Mia died. I dunno it just feels like this spark has been ignited in him again and it wasn't until you came along that it happened."

"John is a good looking guy and he can have any woman he wants. Trust me I am nowhere near the league he is in."

"Give yourself some credit." Mickie scolded her new friend. "You are a beautiful woman. You just need some new man catching clothes. Something that shows a little more skin."

"NO SKIN!!!" Whitney shouted, causing everyone in the laundry mat to look at them. Her cheeks blanched.

"Come on Whit you can barely see the scar. Unless someone is staring right where it is and you point it out I wouldn't worry about it."

"Easy for you to say. You still have all your original organs." Mickie's cell rang. She looked at the caller id.

"I'll be right back. Gotta take this it's my dad." She stepped out of the laundry mat and began walking up and down the sidewalk. "What did you find out Mike?"

"Well according to this Mia's kidneys, liver, and heart were transplanted. One kidney went to some guy named Seth in Ohio, the other went to a woman named Beth in DC. The liver ..."

"Mike I really only care about the heart ..."

"Ok ... ok" Miz huffed. "Mia's heart went to someone from Massachusetts. A woman named Whitney Langston. Ha that is kinda funny that his new PA is named Whitney."

"GOOD BYE MICHAEL." She hung up the phone muttering what an idiot The Miz was. She took a deep breath and ran a hand through her hair. "We are in for one extremely emotional roller coaster ride." She predicted to herself. "It's gonna get ugly before it gets better."

"You ok?" Whitney asked when Mickie walked back into the building. "You look like you have seen a ghost." Mickie couldn't help herself as she threw her arms around Whitney and hugged her tightly.

"Everything is gonna be ok." She assured her new friend as she wiped away her own tears. "Just remember that."

"Mickie you are scaring me."

"Never mind me. It's nothing I ... I just needed a hug. Sometimes I get like that. Let's go get something to eat. I am starving."

"If you say so ..." Whitney had a feeling Mickie was holding something back from her. But at the moment she was too hungry and still very irritated at John to really be totally bothered by that fact. She just kinda figured only time would tell. If Mickie wanted to let her in on what she knew then she would in time. For that moment Whitney was not going to worry. Life was better for her that way.

A/N: Ok so I felt bad about leaving you guys hanging like that so I decided to give you a little bit more before I take my time off. But I fear I have left you hanging once again ... sorry. Feel free to threaten me via twitter to get my ass back to my computer asap. aj_harris1216. With that being said I will be checking in so be safe and enjoy.


	9. Chapter 9

"Have fun on your long ass drive." Mickie laughed. Traveling with John in a car had come to be an experience she did not enjoy anymore.

"We'll be fine. And if he starts getting all pissy and brooding then I will simply just take a nap."

"Who knows maybe he will be fine ... but then again maybe he won't be." Mickie replied off handedly.

"Not like I have much of a choice. It's my job to travel with John and make sure he is where he is supposed to be when he is supposed to be there."

--

"Let's play 20 questions." John suggested.

"Are you serious? I haven't played that game in years." Whitney laughed.

"What's your favorite color?" John asked.

"Baby blue." She replied. She hated the generic questions.

"Mine also just regular blue not baby blue"

"Ok favorite brand of beer?"

"That is an easy one Coors Light" He smirked.

"When is your birthday?" John asked.

"August 16th. You?"

"April 23rd."

"When you did drink what was your favorite drink?" John asked.

"Raspberry vodka and sprite. What about yours?"

"Jack Daniels."

"Favorite song?" John asked.

"It changes but right now it is More Than a Memory by Garth Brooks."

"Country fan huh?"

"Bet your ass I am."

"My favorite song is In Color by Jamey Johnson."

"I love that song!" She exclaimed lunging for her bag so she could grab her ipod. She connected a cord to her ipod and then to the cigarette lighter. John's favorite song began playing from the speakers.

John began smirking "What is your favorite sexual position?" He really didn't expect her to answer he just thought it would be funny to ask.

"I like being on top." She answered honestly. He was surprised. He gave her an interested look.

"Really?"

"Yep." It was her turn to smirk. She couldn't help but resist. "What's yours?"

"It all depends on what I am doing. If it's just a wam bam thank you ma'am in and out kinda thing then I like the girl on top but if I actually care about the woman and want to work at it I love hitting in fast and hard from behind."

"This is the most inappropriate topic a boss and his employee should be discussing."

"Well you are my brother's friend so I think of you more as a friend than just simply an employee."

"Thanks John. You know you aren't as bad as Sean warned."

"Sean has seen me in some pretty dark times. It was smart of him to warn you." John shook his head.

"Hey what's the weirdest job you have ever had?" Whitney asked purposely changing the subject so that he would not have to open up old wounds. He gave her an appreciative smile.

"I was a little league umpire and they hated me." He laughed at the memory "then there was the limo driver stint where I would get lost constantly." She laughed a little herself. "What is the place you consider to be your home away from home?"

"A hospital." She said without even thinking. He gave her an odd look. "I used to be very sick but I'm ok now."

"Sorry to hear that."

"It's over and done with." She shrugged. "Name your most life changing moment."

"That's easy … When Mia died and I completely shut down. I swear sometimes I thought we were invincible but I learned the hard way that we weren't"

"I know what you mean." It was true she did know a thing or two about not being invincible.

"Favorite car?" he asked.

"Pontiac GTO Judge."

"NO WAY! That is my favorite car too. Do you know about cars?"

"Yea. Car and Driver was all I read while in the hospital. Must have read those damn things cover to cover eighteen times before I finally got a new one."

"You have no idea how incredibly hot that is." He approved.

"Favorite band?"

"Don't have one. You?"

"Tied between The Red Hot Chili Peppers and the E Street Band."

"Springsteen huh? That's cool." He could respect that.

"Favorite article of clothing?" she asked.

"Probably a hat. I am always wearing a hat. I do it so people don't have to look at my ugly mug." He grinned at her.

"You are hardly ugly." She scoffed. This made his grin wider.

"Who is your favorite family member?" he asked her.

"My mom is really the only family member I have. So I would have to say her. What about you? Who is yours?"

"Right now I am gonna have to say Sean." Her face reddened a little.

"Favorite past time?" he asked.

"Sleeping." She replied.

"Nice choice."

"Favorite sport?" she asked him.

"Football … but then again baseball is followed close behind."

"Favorite food?" he asked.

"I'm a pizza girl. I could seriously eat a whole large cheese by myself and then feel horrible about it and spend the next three hours in the nearest gym."

"I am a steak and potatoes kinda guy myself."

"Favorite ice cream."

"Ben and Jerry's Peanut Butter Cup." They both said at the same time.

"No way!" Again simultaneously.

"Hey we made it." She said. John frowned as he pulled into their newest home away from home. He wished the ride was just a little longer. She hopped out of the car as soon as he parked and was instantly at the back unloading all their things.

"Here let me take those." He slung both his bags and her's over his strong shoulders.

"Come on John you don't need to do that."

"It's not like they are heavy for me." He laughed. "I lift up Show for Christ's sake."

"True but I still feel kinda scumbagish."

"Don't feel that way at all. I am still a little bit of a gentleman." He said.

She grabbed their key cards and they both headed towards the elevators. They went up eight floors and exited. Their rooms were in the middle of a long hallway. He walked behind her. She stopped in front of her door and opened it. She allowed him to go first and he placed her bags in the middle of the suite's living room.

"So you coming out tonight?" he asked.

"Nope … neither are the girls. We are having a girl's night. So please be careful tonight." He wasn't sure why but the fact that she worried about him made him feel all warm inside.

"I will I promise." He gave her his famous dimpled lopsided smile. "I gotta go. Want to get a few hours in the gym before the show."

"Alrighty see you later then." She handed him in key card. "And remember what I said about being careful."

He waved his hand in acknowledgement as he closed the door behind him. Whitney placed her hand over her heart. For some reason that she didn't know her heart sped up when John smiled, or when he laughed. She wasn't sure why but she had the strangest urge to listen to Bon Jovi's "(You Want To) Make a Memory".


	10. Chapter 10

"Hey Mick you seen Whitney?" John asked his best female friend as he playfully tugged on the end of her ponytail.

"Why is something wrong ... oh my god she isn't sick is she?" Mickie was instantly worried.

John gave her a strange look. "Not that I know of." He remarked. "Unless there is something you know that I do not."

"I don't know anything." Mickie said flatly trying to throw him off her scent. "Nope ... not a damn thing. I never know things." She frowned as if that fact bothered her.

"You are a weirdo." He seemed not to suspect anything. She breathed a sigh of relief.

"You sure you are ok?" he asked taking a sip of her latte only to make a face seconds later because it was too sweet for him.

"You always do that." She laughed at him and handed him a napkin.

"Some days it isn't as sweet." He responded as he used the napkin to wipe his tongue off. "Anyways I haven't seen Whitney all day and I wanted to know if you had."

"I think she said something about having a doctor's appointment." Mickie had remembered hearing her mention something like that the night before. "Yep ... that is where she is. Having her heart checked out." Her eyes went wide as she realized what she had just said. Some friend she was. She felt horrible.

"What's the matter with her heart?" John asked. He had remembered her saying that she was very sick at one time in her life. Maybe it was her heart that had been affected.

"Umm ... she might have mentioned getting a lot of heart burn." She hoped her lie sounded convincing. "I don't really know ... maybe it was her stomach she said was bothering her and not her heart. That makes so much more sense I mean come on she is a young woman. There is no need for her to lets say have a heart transplant or anything like that." She laughed nervously as if the thought were absurd.

John seemed to ponder it for a moment. "Yea you are probably right."

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure." She agreed.

"Do you think if I asked Whit to dinner she would go ... nothing serious I just wanna thank her for doing such a great job keeping me in line."

Mickie mentally had an Aww moment. "I do not see why she wouldn't. Especially if it is as platonic as you say."

"I'm kinda nervous. It's been a while since I took a woman out in any shape or form." He scratched the back of his head.

"I am sure it will be fine. How about you go and try to find her." Mickie suggested.

"Ok." He stood back up and left.

--

He decided to try her room once again. This time he could hear music playing from within. He knocked and heard her yell to come in. He found her with her palms against the floor and the lower half of her body in the arm. Some sort of yoga stretch he deduced.

"Well hello there." He wolf whistled which caused her to blush furiously.

She straightened up and swiped the hair out of her face. "You saw nothing." She told him.

"Well that specific kind of nothing is my favorite kind of nothing." He gave her a wink.

"Was there something you needed or did you just want to make me completely embarrassed?" she asked.

"I wanted to thank you for all the hard work you have done by taking you to dinner tonight. Not as in like a date but just to show my gratitude. Just two people sharing a meal ... with absolutely no strings attached." He began to sweat a little as he rocked back and forth on his heels.

"Umm ... ok. Yea that will be fine. Meet me back here at like seven." She said.

"Really?" his voice rose a few octaves in surprise.

"Yea. Unless you want to change your mind."

"No!" he exclaimed a little too loudly. "I just didn't expect you to be so quick to agree."

"You said it yourself it is not a date." She returned to her yoga.

"By the way I still have a few questions left to ask you and you have to answer them honestly." He told her.

"Ok ..." she was a little confused on what he could possibly want to ask her but she would answer what he asked to the best of his ability.

"See you tonight then." He said.

"Till tonight." She called to him as he let himself out of her room.


	11. Chapter 11

He knocked on her hotel room door. She answered the door and gave him a dazzling smile. He stood before her in a pair of jeans and a white dress shirt which he had purposely left the top couple of buttons undone.

"You clean up nice." She teased him as she closed the door behind her. She herself wore a red off the shoulder cardigan sweater and a fitted pair of dark blue jeans. She knew she would owe Mickie for a long time for making her look so nice for her outing. About an hour after John left Mickie had shown up for a complete and total make over. Up until thirty minutes before John had shown up Whitney had been Mickie's living Barbie doll.

He stood there for a moment taking her in. Then he realized that he was staring and quickly looked away. "This is for you." He handed her a single red rose. "The man in the lobby was selling them and I thought maybe you would like one."

"Thank you." She took the rose from him. "But you really did not have to."

"I know I didn't but I wanted to." He gave her a shy smile.

"So where are we going?" she asked him.

"You like Italian food?" he asked.

"Sure do."

"Then I know the perfect little outdoor bistro not too far from here." He held out his hand to her. She took it and the moment their hands touched they both felt some sort of unexplained static shock.

By the time they arrived at the bistro the sun was starting to set. Behind them was a panoramic sky above a clear blue pond.

"It's beautiful here." There was shyness in the way that she would not totally meet his glance.

He felt it too. No matter how many times he reminded himself that it was not a date part of him felt like it was. Part of him felt like a total asshole, like by being out with Whitney he was spitting all over Mia's memory. But another part of him couldn't help but think of how right it felt to be there in that very moment.

"Penny for your thoughts." He froze. That was Mia's favorite saying. His right hand slowly made its way into a fist. He closed his eyes and tried to calm down. She hadn't known.

"John did I do something wrong?" she asked. He could hear the concern in her voice. He opened his eyes to find a set of very worried hazel orbs trained at him.

"No everything is fine." He assured her. He gave her a weak smile. "But I believe it is me who should be asking the questions."

"Go ahead."

"Ok I know you mentioned before that you were sick how bad was it?"

"I shouldn't be alive right now." She stated grimly.

"What was the matter with you?"

"I'll show you." She removed the sweater she was wearing. She had a white spaghetti strapped tank top on underneath. She walked closer to him to allow him to see the faint scar that took up half of her chest. That jagged line that made her feel like a freak. His eyes studied in curiously. He stood and reached his hand out but stopped about an inch away. He gave her a questioning look and she nodded. With one finger he made his way down the length of her chest following the scar. "My heart was failing and I needed a new one. I was literally hours from death when they rushed me up to the OR and gave me my new heart. I shouldn't be standing here with you right now but I am." Both of them seemed to notice that when he touched her the rhythm of her heart beat increased.

"Does anyone else know?" his voice thick with emotions that he could not comprehend. His whole hand had somehow found its way to where her heart rested.

"Just my mom and Mickie." She answered confirming what he already kinda knew.

"That explains the weirdness." She gave him a look. "Don't worry about it."

She went to put her sweater back on but he stopped her. "You are beautiful. There is no need to cover your scar. You are perfect no matter what."

"Thank you." She blushed a little. He didn't want to admit to himself that he liked it when she did.

--

After dinner they went back to his hotel room. There was going to be a meteor shower that night that Whitney really wanted to see. They were sitting with their legs dangling in between the railings.

John had a beer in his hands. Whitney's attention was split between the sky and the wedding party that was being thrown in the hotel garden. Which the balcony happened to over look.

"They look so happy." Whitney gazed down fondly at the newly married couple.

"Yes they do." John agreed.

"It is now time for the married couple to have their first dance." Unchained Melody began to play.

"Dance with me." John said.

She cocked her head to the side to look at him. "Really?"

"Yea" he grinned at her. He pulled her to her feet and wrapped his arms around her tiny waist. She in turn wrapped her arms around his neck. They swayed back and forth to the haunting melody. Whitney couldn't help herself she closed her eyes and rested her head against John's broad chest. He caught a whiff of her hair which smelled of vanilla. It drove his senses into a frenzy. She looked up at him just as the song was about to end. He brought his face down. His lips inches from hers. The moment was perfect. Everything was perfect in that one second. He hesitated at first but she did not pull away. He wanted so badly to kiss her. He hadn't felt the physical need to be intimate with a woman in a long time but the force of his need was staggering to him.

"I'm going to kiss you." He stated the obvious.

"Go ahead"

She closed her eyes and waited. But she would not get her kiss that night. The most unwanted sound of someone banging on the hotel room door sent both back to their right senses. John let her out of his grip.

"It's Mickie I can tell by the knock." He looked at her sadly.

"I should be calling it a night anyways." She walked painfully away from him. She needed to separate herself from him so that the pounding in her heart would stop. She had been with plenty of men in her life but with none of them did she ever feel the overwhelming need as she felt right now. If she hadn't gotten away from him at that moment she could not have been held responsible for her actions.


	12. Chapter 12

"So tell me about your date last night." Mickie cornered Whitney the next morning.

"It was not a date. I do not date." Whitney scoffed. But the slight reddening gave her true feelings away.

"You totally were on a date and you had a good time." Mickie squealed. "I am so happy for you guys."

"We're just friends Mickie." Whitney corrected her before she could totally blow things out of proportion.

"Riiight." Mickie wasn't believing anything Whitney was saying to her. "Come with me. I wanna have some fun."

--

"Mickie I am not putting on your wrestling gear." Whitney protested.

"Come on Whit I am sure you will look great."

"No, I know that I am gonna look completely stupid." She frowned. "My body could never look the same way yours does."

"Just go." Mickie handed her the stuff and pushed her into the bathroom.

"What was the point of this?" Whitney sighed as she stepped out into Mickie's line of vision.

"To prove that you look amazing even with that hardly noticeable scar."

"Knock knock." John let himself into the room. "Wow …" he stopped in his tracks. His mouth slightly ajar.

"See I told you I would look like a freak." Whitney said starting to get upset.

"You don't look like a freak." John found himself saying. "You look … just wow."

"Ignore him honey." Mickie rolled her eyes. "You look amazing."

"You guys are crazy." Whitney shook her head. She felt disgusted with herself for even allowing Mickie to dress her up this way. She crossed her arms and scowled.

"Ok have you had enough fun making fun of me now?" Whitney asked moodily before stomping off towards the bathroom to change.

"What the hell did you do to her?" Mickie shot an accusing glare towards John.

"Nothing ... I didn't do anything I swear. We had a great night ... there was the almost kiss ... but I don't think that would have sent her into an angry fit."

"An almost kiss John ... god you are an idiot. Do you have any idea what an almost kiss does to a woman's psyche?"

"Well you interrupted it." He shot back at her.

"Don't blame this on me. If you had wanted to kiss her then you would have and then answered the door."

"Maybe you are right." He relented.

"Leaving now ... I have a lot of work to do so I would appreciate it if I was undisturbed for the rest of the day." Whitney left Mickie's room.

Both Mickie and John watched her leave in confusion. Then Mickie turned to John and popped him one upside the head.

"Ouch! You psycho." He rubbed the spot where she hit him.

"I have no idea what you did but fix it." She punched him in the arm.

"You ever think it was you treating her like a human Barbie doll that pissed her off?" She popped him again.

"Ok ok fine just stop hitting me."


	13. Chapter 13

"Sweetheart I am so happy you are home. Have you been taking your medicine?" Her mother rushed out of the front door to greet her.

"Yes Ma." She grumbled as she rolled her luggage past her mother into the house.

"You look thin. Have you been eating properly?" Elaine seemed unphased by the fact that her daughter was shunning her.

"Yes Ma. I eat three meals a day like everyone else." Whitney sighed. She had grown accustomed to not having someone fuss over her every five seconds.

"So did you make any friends on the road? What about Sean's brother? Is he nice?"

"Yes I made some great friends on the road. Sean's brother is very nice, he's also brooding and incredibly attractive. He also knows about my scar and doesn't care. He thinks I look beautiful no matter what."

"So why the hell are you home?" Elaine placed her hands on her hips. "If there is a guy out there who knows about your secret and doesn't care then why are you running away from him?"

"He lost his fiancée last year and I cannot control my feelings around him and I do not want to be the person who takes away from the time he needs to grieve."

"Does he seem unhappy around you?"

"He did at first. Always getting drunk and yelling at everyone but now it's like he has slowly gotten that spark of life back in him. He's smiling a lot more and laughing." There was a spark in Whitney's eyes that her mother had never noticed before.

"Well how about you go and relax and I will grab the supplies for tonight's dinner?" She suggested. "We're having beef stew."

"Sounds fine to me. Tell Sean I say hi." Whitney replied as she heading towards her bedroom. "Also don't forget the Grand's biscuits."

The warm summer air felt wonderful against Elaine's skin. There was a little bounce in her step and a song in her heart. Her daughter had met someone. She no longer seemed to have to worry about her daughter ending up alone. That fact alone took so much weight off of her shoulders.

--

Sean looked relieved as she walked into the store. "Hey Mrs. Langston." He moved swiftly from behind the counter so his brother couldn't pester him anymore.

"You wouldn't happen to be Whitney's mother would you?" Sean grimaced as John began following them around the store.

"Why yes I would and from the resemblance you must be John." Elaine said with a smile.

"I'm Whitney's friend Mickie. We have been so worried with the way she suddenly disappeared that we thought we should check up on her."

"It's nice to meet both of you." She shook both their hands. "She seems a little tired but I blame that on jet lag. Other than that she's fine."

"Well that's good." Mickie smiled.

"Hey, would all three of you like to come over for dinner?" Elaine asked. "I'm sure Whitney would be happy to have you."

"I don't think ..." Sean started but his brother soon had his arms around his neck in what looked like a playful hug but was actually a choke hold.

"We'd all be delighted." John assured her with a smile.

"Great. Well Sean knows the address and we will probably eat around seven." She took her leave. Mickie walked away with her.

"If you ever do something like that again, I'll make sure you pass out." John shook his head. "I want Whit over here. Don't be stupid and suggest otherwise to her Mom."

"Fine. Sheesh." Sean rubbed his throat and walked away. 'I'm a dead man.' He thought before turning around again. "But she obviously left for a reason so do you really think forcing her to see you in her home is the right thing to do?" John glared at his youngest brother.

"You know, maybe I should have choked you out." John continued to glare. He ran a hand over his face in frustration. He wanted to make a mends with Whitney, he just wasn't sure how to do that exactly. Dinner with her family was his only option. Sean was his only hope at convincing her to listen to him. Whatever he did he was extremely sorry for.

"If you want her to go so bad, maybe you shouldn't have put me in a choke hold." Sean laughed. John looked at him with pleading eyes. "Ugh, I'll see what I can do." He sighed and left his older brother to think things through.

--

"Can I help you in any way Mrs. Langston?" Mickie asked as she followed the older woman around in the store.

"So what really happened between those two and please call me Elaine."

"Your guess is as good as mine. I know that he likes her and I am pretty sure that she likes him but I think she is scared by how much she likes him."

"What's his deal?" Elaine asked.

"Well John is a great guy. He was engaged to a woman that really was his whole world but then she died and he was simply a shell of his former self but then Whitney showed up and she was the spark of life he needed."

"And he knows about her heart?"

"Yes, it doesn't bother him in the slightest. He thinks she is perfect the way she is."

"So this guy is successful and doesn't care about her scar and left the road to come here and talk to her because he thinks he did something wrong to cause her to come back home? Is that the gist of it?"

"Basically."

"My daughter is a moron. Come on I am going to need some help convincing her to come out of her room after she finds out John is coming over for dinner." Elaine paid for her purchases and Mickie helped her carry her bags home.

--

"Her room is the last one of the left. She may or may not be sleeping at the moment."

Whitney happened to be awake. She had her headphones in her ears as she lay with her eyes closed listen to Flo Rida's "Sugar". Mickie opened the door and called her name but the music was way too loud. So she decided to have a little fun by plopping down next to her friend on the bed. Whitney's eyes shot open in surprise.

"Hey buddy." Mickie grinned at the startled woman. "Nice room."

"What are you doing here?" Whitney asked surprised. "Me and John followed you back to Massachusetts and Sean introduced us to your mom and she invited us to dinner."

"John is coming here ... to my house?" Whitney wanted to punch a wall. "MOM ..." she got off the bed and stormed out into the kitchen. "How dare you!"

"I want grandchildren." Elaine justified. "And he is a good looking guy and those babies would be breathtakingly beautiful."

"I agree." Mickie chimed in.

"UGH! You guys are ridiculous!" She went back to her room and slammed her door.

"Is that normal behavior for her?" Mickie asked.

"No, not really."

"I have to let you in on a huge secret." Mickie was going to explode. "But you cannot tell Whitney. This is something that she needs to discover for herself. But her new heart used to belong to John's fiancée."

"How can you be sure?"

"The timing matches up exactly and I may have had a computer geek that John and I work with hack into the transplant files and they came back with Whitney's name." Mickie laid out all the facts.

"Wow ... I do not even know how to process that information." Elaine had a seat in a nearby chair. "And neither of them know?"

"Nope. And I am not going to tell them."

"Yea. It's better to keep something like this to yourself. No telling how either of them will react."

--

John and Sean arrived exactly at seven as they were told to. Mickie and Elaine had forced Whitney out of her bedroom. Although she was not happy about it she answered the door and let both Cena brothers into her home.

"Hey Whit." Sean gave his friend a hug. "It's great to see you again."

"You too Sean." She truly was happy to see her friend again. John felt a pang of jealousy as his youngest brother hugged the woman.

"Hey John." Whitney said stiffly. She wasn't sure how to act with him out of their normal setting. Because here he wasn't her boss. He didn't need her to keep his schedule organized at the moment. He was here in her home as an invited guest.

He too felt the awkwardness. He was just as unsure of things as she was. "Hi." He replied back to her. "I umm ... brought some flowers. Our old man taught as never to show up empty handed." He spoke nervously.

She could hear his nervousness and it make her feel a little better. "Thank you." She gave him a genuine smile. "Sean you know where the living room is. Make yourselves comfortable. I think Mick might be in there watching Sweet November."

--

"John brought flowers with him." Whitney announced as she strolled into the kitchen. She quickly set the flowers in a vase with water. Before placing them on the kitchen table.

"See he's a proper gentleman."

"Ma ... enough." Whitney grimaced.

"You aren't getting any younger you know. Your biological clock is only gonna be ticking for so much longer."

"Gah ... Ma you are driving me crazy!" Whitney walked out of the room.

"Mick my mother is rambling off about biological clocks and such." Whitney complained as she had a seat next to her friend on the couch.

"Honey you still have plenty of time." Mickie said not taking her focus off the screen.

Whitney had seen the movie before. She could relate. She knew what it was like living with an expiration date. It sucked, it was an experience she never wished on anyone. John kept stealing glances as her as she watched the movie. Her face was a mask of so many different emotions.

"Dinner is ready." Elaine announced. All four adults in the room jumped because they were so into the movie. Well John was more into studying Whitney but he was surprised none the less.

--

"So John ... tell me what is it like to wrestle for a living?" Elaine asked. John thought about it for a couple of minutes.

"It's a dream come true." He said. "Getting to travel all over the world and be in a different city each night is amazing."

"Well what happens when you finally settle down and have a few kids?" Elaine asked. Whitney shot her mother a glare.

"Well I guess if that were the case then I would be home a lot more. I wouldn't want my kids thinking that their dad didn't want to be around. I'd totally be the guy with the video camera taping my kid in a play." John answered good-naturedly. He didn't seem to realize that Elaine was already planning his and Whitney's wedding in her head.

"Good answer." Elaine said which earned a laugh from everyone but her daughter. She pushed her food around on her plate for a little bit longer before finally becoming so annoyed that she stood up.

"I'd better get started on those pots and pans. Everyone else continue enjoying your meal." She stepped out of the dining room and into the kitchen.

"May I?" John asked Elaine. He was looking for her permission to go talk to her daughter.

"Yes you may and you may also tell her that her mother is very annoyed with her due to her rudeness."

"I will pass along the message." John followed the direction of where Whitney went.

She had donned a pair of yellow rubber gloves and was currently scrubbing a Teflon pan to death.

"You know it really isn't the pans fault." John lightly joked. She seemed less than amused.

"How can you not see what she is doing?" Whitney shot at him accusingly. "And you are taking the bait."

"I know what she was doing but I am not going to be rude. Besides I'm used to it. I have that effect on people's mothers. They all want me to marry their daughters."

"It's not right."

"Why did you leave?" He cut right to the point. "Was it something I did because if it was I am sincerely sorry."

She took the gloves off and placed her hands on her hips. "How can you be sorry if you aren't even aware if you did something or not." She had a point and he knew it.

"I'm sorry if I drove you away." He offered.

"I drove myself away." She stated. "John your fiancée died ... I have no right to even think of trying to replace what you guys had."

"I am touched that you feel that way but don't you think that that is kinda my decision to make. Look ... I dunno what is going to happen tomorrow or ten years from now. But what I do know is that for the first time since Mia died I don't feel dead inside. I wake up in the morning looking forward to things. You are right you will never replace Mia but I do not expect you too. Part of me will always be grateful for the time we had together but I am slowly starting to learn that I do not have to be miserable. Her death has taught me that we are not invincible and with that knowledge we should enjoy the time we do have on earth. She wouldn't want me to be unhappy and alone for the rest of my life." He moved closer to her. He was relieved that she did not move away from him. "I should have done this that night but I guess it's better late than never huh?" He brought his face close to her's and just like before she did not pull away. His lips touched hers and the moment they did it felt like there was an electrical current running through the both of them.

"Wow ..." she said as they broke apart.

"So what do you say? Come back into the other room and enjoy the fact that your mother cares enough about you to be all pushy and obsessive."

"Fine." She pretended like she was giving into some really horrible demand. "But there is only so much I can take."

"Well at least you are not alone."

"I take solace in that." He took her hand and led her back into the dining room. Things were looking up for them. But as everyone knows what goes up must come down eventually.


	14. Chapter 14

"Mick what I need you to do is buy her a whole bunch of stuff that she will need to her trip."

"Like what?" Mickie asked.

"I dunno what do you need on a tropical island? I would go with I dunno ... swim suits ... skimpy clothing ... sexy negligee."

"Cena, I'm not feeding your hormones. This is Whitney we're talking about. She's like a bottled up love puppy. She's still way subconscious about her scar. And um, sexy negligee? I don't want to know. I didn't think you two were at that point yet."

"I'm still a guy ya know. And what better way then to make her not be subconscious is there then to well ... make her enjoy being naked?"

"Visions of you naked. I just threw up in my mouth." She gagged.

"Like you have never seen me naked before."

"Believe me everyone has seen you naked before."

"True." John chuckled.

"I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you." John truly was appreciative.

"So how come you don't surprise me like this for my birthday?" Mickie asked.

"Do you want an honest answer?" He asked. She nodded. "Well I am not trying to get into your pants."

"JOHN CENA!" Mickie shrieked.

"What?" John shrugged. "I like her, a lot. She knows this and since Mia's been gone, she's the only female who has remotely caught my attention like she used to. It's odd and it's hard to pick up and move on but I'm deeply attracted to her." Mickie shot him a look "Plus I'm a male who hasn't gotten any in a while and the shovinest in me that lies somewhere beneath all this charm and whit is looking to get laid. If Whitney is not ready for that, I'm not pushing it. But you never know where a tropical vacation might lead to."

"So what about me do you not find attractive?" Mickie asked.

"Mick, you are a knockout. But to me you are like one of the guys." He got out of range of her backhand.

"Ass." Mickie giggled.

"Love you." Then he smirked. "Just don't wanna fuck ya."

"Like you would even get a chance to." Mickie scoffed.

"HEY!"

"You started it." Mickie smirked. "I think I might ask Michelle and Barbie to help me out on this. It's going to take more than one of us to spring this on her. She'll have to be ready before she even knows you're leaving."

"Yes that is a good idea. And I think you should model each swimsuit and take lots of pictures. Also if you guys decide to kiss I am not apposed to that."

"I am calling up Fabo and telling him all these dirty things that you are saying to me." Mickie jokingly threatened.

"Do it. Maybe he'll tell Whitney and I might get a good spanking out of it." He remarked walking away from her.

"God you are such a pervert!" She yelled at him.

--

"So what are we looking for? One piece ... bikini ... dental floss?" Michelle asked. Mickie bit down on her lower lip. One on hand she wanted to be fair to Whitney but then again she didn't want to listen to John either.

"I'd say a one piece maybe with a sexy zipper and then a flash hot blood red string bikini. Whit looks good in deep red. She's a blonde. Pink works too." Mickie smiled.

"So why is Whit so apposed to showing some skin?" Barbie asked.

"She's really subconscious." Mickie half lied.

"Oh. Makes sense." Barbie shrugged. "She's hot though. I don't see why."

"Micks, you know better than anyone, what's their like 'status'?" Michelle asked with air quotes.

"Uh....well, I guess you could say they're dating. I don't know." Mickie answered with a shrug.

"They are dating but I am guessing that if he is going to this extreme that she isn't putting out." Michelle laughed.

"He's a boy and she's a girl and they're dating. I can almost promise you that she hasn't put out. That's how self-conscious she is. She's.....very doubtful, of her appearance." Mickie explained.

"But please don't' repeat that!"

"OMG ... seriously???"

"Michelle, will you shut up." Mickie's eyes bugged. "Just help me help Cena."

"But why?"

"I don't know." Mickie lied. She knew fully the reason why. Whitney was scared. She was afraid her scar would be a focal point in anything physical with any man and she wasn't ready for that, no matter how well of a connection she and John Cena shared. But what Whitney failed to see is how badly John was dealing with the whole no sex thing. He got that she was scared but he couldn't help her till she helped herself.

--

"Randy man I am thinking about trying to stick it into a light socket." John confessed.

"Um, what happened to trying to deal with like not being physical because you've lost your fiancée?" Randy, as usual, was confused.

"I did that. It sucked and I have moved on."

"Use your hand."

"It's not the same."

"But have you fully moved on? I mean how long have you and Whit been together? Two, three months?"

"You were with Sam for like two seconds before you banged her."

"That's different. I had to use my damn brain to remember her number. She wouldn't even write it down. Whitney is your assistant. Have you thought about the implications of all that?

"Who died and gave you a brain?" John asked.

Randy sighed. "No one. But as your best friend, I'm looking out for you. I saw the way you were after she died and I see the way you are now. Sure you're different, and you seem happy, but I want to make sure you don't hurt either one of you."

"I am not putting a gun to her head. She can say no."

"Alright. Alright." Randy conceded. "But is your relationship at that level?"

"Gah! Dude, back off! This was easier talking to Mickie about."

"You talked to Mickie before me?" Randy asked offended.

"Only because I needed her to pack for Whitney. This Aruba trip is a complete surprise."

"What did she say about the subject?"

"Go for it." John shot back.

"Mickie James told you to go for it? I hardly doubt that."

"In a way. She started off sounding like you but then she swayed the opposite way."

"Ok well let's say you come on too strong and you scare her off. She has worked so hard to let go of her stigma I just don't want to see her get hurt. Because she if gets hurt she is going to end up hurting you as well and then you will both be back at square one." Randy had recently been let in on the secret after a dinner party where Whitney forgot to bring her meds and they all ended up in the ER.

"You don't think I have thought about that. But I honestly show her that it doesn't matter then maybe she will not be ashamed of it anymore. If she sees that someone can see her completely naked and not be repulsed by her scar. Think of how much of a confidence boost that would be."

Randy got what his friend was talking about, he really did. But he still found it too big of a risk. "It's your relationship and you are gonna do what you want anyways so I hope it works out for you." John's phone signaled him to the fact he had a new text. It was from Mickie telling him that everything was packed and ready to go.

"I gotta go. But thanks."

--

When John entered the hotel room Whitney was pacing. She looked up at him as he walked deeper into the room. "John what is going on? It's like you dropped off the face of the earth for two weeks. I try and make calls but nobody knows anything."

"I took some time off." He responded.

"Is something wrong?" She stopped pacing and looked at him with horror filled eyes. The thought of one of his family members being sick or something along those lines had never occurred to her.

"No, everything is fine. Just felt like taking some time off." He explained.

"When were you going to let me in on that little fact?"

"I think you need some sleep. You look exhausted. Come on into bed we go." He gently guided her into the bedroom. She got into bed and allowed him to tuck her in. Then he went to leave the room. He needed to meet up with Mickie for some last minute planning.

"Aren't you coming to bed too?" She asked sitting up a little.

"In a few." He gave her a smile. "But I wanna catch a little television first."

"Oh, alright." She let out a yawn. "Just don't stay up too late."

"I won't I promise." He assured her. "Sweet dreams."

--

"Here coffee." Mickie handed him a cup of Starbuck's coffee. He blew on it for a few minutes before he finally took a sip. "This is gonna be a long night so drink up." She advised him. "So all the clothes are bought and packed. You have the reservations and the plane will be waiting tomorrow morning."

But John's mind was miles away. His memories had taken him back in time to when they made their relationship official. It was still fresh in his mind as if it had just happened earlier that day.

_*Flashback*_

_John had given Whitney the day off to hang out with Mickie. They were going to spend the afternoon together and then meet up with the rest of the gang that night. There was a carnival in the town they were in and most of the superstars were going. It was a little after eight when the girls came strolling in. It was warm out so they were both dress in t-shirts and short shorts._

"_Hey buddy." Mickie said as she casually threw her right arm around John's waist. "This girl is so much fun."_

"_Is she drunk?" John asked amused._

"_Pretty much yea. We went to a wine tasting and Mickie was not aware that you were only supposed to take a little sip of each wine." Both John and Whitney laughed._

"_Hey Randy. Why doesn't Mickie hang out with you for a while?" John suggested. "She was just saying the other day that she does not hang out with her good pal Randy as much as she should." Randy eyed his best friend distrustfully but then relented._

"_OH come on Randy win me that huge bear." A drunken Mickie began dragging a less than amused Legend Killer away._

"_You owe me one Cena." Randy yelled as he was being dragged away. _

"_Poor Randy." Whitney began to laugh. "He's in for an interesting night."_

"_He'll be fine." John said wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "Would you like me to win you a bear?" He asked kinda hoping she would say yes. He wanted her to think he was that kind of guy, the one who won stuffed animals for the woman he cared about._

"_Sure." She smiled at him._

_They walked over to one of the games where you have to make five baskets to win a prize. John made all five baskets with ease. The smile on Whitney's face was huge as they handed her a stuffed bear that was almost bigger than The Big Show._

"_Nobody has ever won me a prize before." She admitted. Hearing that made him even more on top of the world. She just looked so happy and that made him happy. He decided that happy is what he wanted to be all the time now._

"_You are you up for a Ferris wheel ride?" He asked._

"_I dunno I am kinda terrified of heights." Her skin turned a slight green color at the mention of the Ferris wheel._

"_I'll be with you the whole time. Besides if you don't go I will fire you." He grinned at her._

"_In that case I quit."_

"_Come on." He rolled his eyes and began pulling her towards the giant wheel._

"_Why do I have to go on that giant Wheel O'Death?" She asked._

"_Because it is fun. And you only live once." _

_They waited in line. Whitney tried to think of ways to get herself out of going but then it was too late. John helped her to get seated and then took his spot next to her. The operator placed the bar on their laps. "See fun." He grinned devilishly at her._

"_It's only funny until this thing breaks and we plummet to our deaths." She retorted sourly._

"_Live a little." But she could not ruin his fun._

"_That is what I am trying to do."_

_The ride began and Whitney held onto the bar so hard her knuckles were white. Her eyes were clamped shut. She was just waiting for it to be over._

"_Come on open yours eyes." He whispered in her ear. She cracked one eye half open. "Look at the amazing view from up here."_

_She opened both of her eyes and it was really had to be scared when she looked out and all she could see was a crimson sky and hills. "Wow ... beautiful."_

"_Umm ... Whit I wanna ask you something and it may come out completely corny but well ... would you be my girlfriend?" she looked at the look on his face and began laughing._

_He frowned and went to open his mouth. But she placed three fingers over his lips to stop him. "Of course you goofball."_

_-- _

He carried his sleeping girlfriend to the cab. She groaned as he got in with her but never woke up. Mickie and Randy had helped him out with the bags. They both told him to have a good time but warned him again about what he was doing. He brushed off their warnings just as he had their previous ones.

He was a little annoyed with the stares he was getting. Then again it was not everyday that John Cena was found walking through an airport with a passed out woman in his arms. On the other hand no one came over and asked for autographs or pictures. Luckily he was boarding a small private jet so he would not have to explain to people. He laid her down on the couch, gotta love private jets, and covered her with a blanket. He watched her sleep completely amused by how deeply she slept. She had been unaffected by the shifting around and having her body moved around. He rested his head against the plush leather chair he was sitting in. The planning had taken longer than he had planned and he had gotten very little sleep.

He woke up to a thud and an exclamation of what the hell. His eyes opened and there his girlfriend was scowling at him. He wanted to laugh but the look on her face told him not to.

"Morning honey." He greeted her with a smile. She stood up and sat back down on the couch.

"Where are we and where are we going?" She asked.

"We are on a private jet headed for Aruba. It's your surprise birthday present. A two week vacation. Just the two of us. Nothing but relaxation on a tropical island."

"Wow ... you must have gone through a lot of planning to pull this one off."

"I wanted to do something nice for you." He admitted. "So think of this as me showing my gratitude for those times when you picked me up from a hallway and took care of me." He gave her a dazzling smile that made her heart skip a few beats.

She placed her hand over her heart and he was at her side in a blink of an eye. "Is something wrong?" There was so much concern for her in his voice.

"Yea I'm fine. It's just sometimes when you smile it sends my heart into a frenzy and it feels like I have known that smile forever."

"Weird and yet very sweet at the same time."

"But how is that possible?" She asked perplexed.

"I learned a long time ago that some things just cannot be explained." John shrugged. "Maybe when I smile I remind you of someone you used to know."

"Maybe ..." But she seemed unsure.

--

John opened the door to their suite and let her go in first. She took in the lavish surroundings. She had never seen anything as amazing as this room was in her whole life. She was too stunned by the beauty of the suite to form words. So she just kinda stood there with her mouth slightly ajar. John just grinned at her. She began to explore.

Their suite consisted of a spacious kitchen and living room. The master bedroom was almost three times bigger than her bedroom at home with an adjoining bathroom. In the bathroom there was a Jacuzzi that could fit John and four or five of his co-workers comfortably. She walked back out into the living room and opened two doors expecting to step out onto a patio but to her surprise there was nothing but beach.

"This place is amazing." She finally was able to get out. She turned back towards John and he was still grinning.

"What?" She asked grinning herself.

"Your reaction made me smile."

"So is this what you do with all the girls you have dated?" She asked curiously. But she wasn't sure if she wanted to know the answer. If he replied yes then this whole trip would lose it's magic.

"Nope, just you." He answered honestly.

"Really not even Mia?"

"Mia got annoyed by too much extravagance. It's like she would spend the whole day yelling at me for spending what she deemed too much money. It got on my nerves but that was just how she was. So I usually came here alone."

"So this is kinda like your spot?"

"Yea pretty much. I love it up here. Nobody to bother you. Nothing but water and sand for miles. Sometimes I come here and spend an entire week just by myself in this suite."

"Must get lonely." She said.

"I go out if I feel the need to be around people. But this is basically where I come to think out life's great mysteries." He explained.

"Care to share one of life's great mysteries."

"How about why is someone as amazingly beautiful and kind and smart as you are so self conscious when there is no need to be?"

She sighed. They had been over this before. "People are cruel John. It seems that even in these modern times they cannot accept difference. People cannot truly understand until it is their heart or kidneys or even eyes that are failing."

"You can get eye transplants?" John asked. That was something he had not known.

"Yes John you can get eye transplants." She shook her head at him.

"Ok with that aside what do you want to do?" He asked her.

"Are you kidding me? The ocean is at my backdoor obviously I wanna go swimming." She began to get excited but then something stopped her. "Wait a minute I didn't have a swim suite in my luggage that I travel with."

"I sent Mickie out. She bought you everything you are going to need." Whitney began to get a little scared.

"Umm ... ok." She took her bags from him and went into the bedroom. She almost fearfully opened the suitcases. "Aww come on what the hell is this!" John heard her exclaim. John began to chuckle.

She came out of the room wearing the one piece with the front zipper zipped all the way up and over that was a grey terrycloth hoodie which she left unzipped.

"I do not think so." He walked over to her and unzipped the zipper of the bathing suit just a little. It came to just above the top of her scar. She went to fix it but he slapped her hand away. "Leave it." He ordered her.

"Fine!" She huffed but she was not happy about feeling so exposed to the world.

"Come on, be happy Whit. We're on vacation. Just you and me. Don't be mad at me for that." John winked. The sound of the waves rolling behind him distracted Whitney. She sighed. "Is the beach calling us or what?" John smiled.

"Let's go." Whitney giggled.

John picked her up and threw her over his shoulder running down to the water's edge with her laughing and playfully screaming the whole way down. He carried her out until the water was about waist deep. "You ready?" He asked.

"For what?" And before she knew it he had dropped her into the warm salt water. Moments later Whitney emerged looking a bit pissed. She was going to say something but a wave took her out and John with her. They both emerged laughing.

"Didn't expect that one." John said shaking his head to rid himself of the excess water. It wasn't the first time Whitney had seen him with his shirt off but there was something different about him with his shirt off and water droplets glistening against his hard sculpted chest. She berated herself for her mouth watering.

John noticed Whit's distraction. "Whit?"

"Huh, what? Oh, yeah I know me either. Come on, I'll race you back." Whitney smiled and began swimming. The natural current had swept them out a bit farther than when John had walked them in.

It turned out that Whitney was a much better swimmer than John was. She liked that fact because when you are dating Superman sometimes it was nice to see him as Clark Kent. But Whitney's win was soon short lived as John playfully and gently tackled her onto the white sand. He brushed her hair out of her face.

"You are beautiful. You know that right." It still made her blush when he said it. But she did like hearing it. It was nice having someone who knew about her emotional baggage and still wanted to be with her.

"You certainly are a charmer." She remarked.

"Oh you have no idea." He leaned in to kiss her. She kissed him back forcefully. His brain, after being deprived of sex for so long, turned itself off and he was on autopilot. His hands began to roam the length of her body. His lips left hers and began to trail down her neck. Lower he went until her began kissing her chest.

Whitney began to panic. Her heart slammed against her ribcage. "John stop." She gently pushed him off of her and sat up. Taking a few deep breaths to try and calm her racing heart down.

"What's the matter?" John felt angry at himself for pushing her. "I am so sorry if you felt I was pushing you too hard."

"No, it's not you. I ... I'm just not there yet." She remarked.

"Ok." He still felt like the biggest asshole to ever walk the planet.

She stood up and grabbed his hand and helped him up. "Come on Mister Cena. There is a lot of beach to explore."

"Ok." He gave her a small lop-sided grin. She surprised him by jumping on his back. He laughed and began running up the beach with her.

"Best trip ever." She yelled as the warm air hit her face.

"It isn't over yet. I have lots of plans."

"I'm scared."

"You should be." He said with a laugh.


	15. Chapter 15

"John would you make fun of me if I got my hair braided?" Whitney asked. She was on her laptop looking over all the activities this specific resort had.

John stopped what he was doing to think about it. "Probably but if you wanna do it then go ahead, because more than likely I will find something to make fun of you about regardless."

"Thanks Honey." She rolled her eyes as she stood up. "Well then I guess I am gonna do it. I mean you only live once right?"

"Yes you do." He agreed.

"You wanna come?" She asked.

"Nope. Me in a hair salon … not my idea of a good time. But have fun and I will be here when you get back." He gave her a quick kiss.

"Ok. But try not to miss me too much." She laughed. He placed his hand over his heart and feigned a look of pain.

"I miss you already." He said in a sappy tone that you would only ever hear in the movies.

"You are an ass." She remarked deciding that he deserved another kiss. She turned to walk away from him.

"Hurry back." He playfully swatted her ass.

She just laughed as she walked out of the room. He just smirked. "That's gonna hurt like hell." He felt bad that he had not warned her but hey it was her idea.

--

Whitney was not sure if she wanted to punch someone in the face or just start crying hysterically as she walked back to the hotel room. She was not sure she had ever been through something so painful in her life. And she had open heart surgery for Christ's sake. She was in a mood and she did not want to deal with his boyfriend's huge smirking expression as she walked back into the room.

"Have fun?" he asked. It took all his strength not to crack up at the look on her face.

"I am going to go take a pain killer and then take a nap. Do not bother me!" She warned him.

--

He left her alone for about two hours and then quietly crept into their shared bedroom. He quietly crept up to her. "Whitney ... wake up hun." He gently shook her awake.

"John please help me unbraid my hair." She begged him. "My scalp feels like it is on fire."

He turned on a nearby bedside lamp and examined his girlfriend's head. "Well your scalp is completely burnt so that is probably why it hurts so badly. Gotta be careful love the sun is a lot stronger down here." She sat up and he began the long process of taking her braids out.

"How do you know how to do this?" Whitney asked.

"Primo showed me how to braid hair and take braids out. Carlito even let me practice on him. Sometimes I lend the guys a hand when they need help with their braids. It's just something to do I guess."

Now it was Whitney's turn to crack up hysterically. "Please, for the love of everything Holy, don't ever admit that to anyone, EVER AGAIN!" She was still giggling when something popped into her mind. "You know as a kid I used to get really bad sunburns and I'd have blisters all over my back and my mother used to have to stay with me all hours just rubbing aloe vera on me and she used to sing as she did it and it used to take the pain away."

"So is that your round about way of asking me to sing to you?" He asked.

"No, that would be me sharing a childhood memory with you." She retorted.

They sat quiet for a few moments but then John started to hum and unrecognizable tune. She didn't mind the humming, in fact she rather enjoyed it. She closed her eyes and just listened. But her peaceful moment was interrupted but John starting to sing Leona Lewis' "Bleeding Love." She let out a howl of laughter and John looked at her like she was crazy. She held onto her sides because they were beginning to ache.

"YOU ... ARE ... S...SUCH ... A ... W... WOMAN!" she managed in between fits of laughter.

"That hurts." He said as he went back to braiding her hair. He said nothing because he was annoyed and she just sat silently because she knew that he could very easily start yanking hair out of her already sensitive scalp. But she just wasn't strong enough to keep her mouth shut.

"John ..." He stopped working when she said his name. He wanted to give her his full attention.

"If you really want to continue singing the song you can." No laugh escaped her lips but he could see her shaking with silent laughter. He grunted and continued what he was doing.

--

"There, all done." He said as he finished the last braid. She stood up and went to the mirror and let out a small shriek.

"I look like a blonde Shirley Temple on crack!" she looked disgusted at the wild mass of curls that was now her normally straight dirty blonde hair.

"Try showering the curls away." John suggested.

"Yea a nice cool shower sounds nice right about now." She agreed. She walked off into the bathroom and John had a seat on the bed. He listened as she turned the shower on. He closed his eyes and attempted to count to ten. That is what Mickie had suggested to him if he got "those kinds of urges".

He took a deep breath. "One ... two ... three ... Fuck this ... it does not work." He began to pace the room.

_What am I supposed to do? She is in there taking a cold shower. Hmm I could warm her up alright. GAH!!!! I am going to die._

"Whit ... how you doin in there?" John asked poking his head into the bathroom. He got no answer. "Whitney!" Now what kind of boyfriend would he be if he did not check on her. She was not answering him and for all he knew she could have gotten dizzy and fell and hit her head and was drowning.

He strode quickly across the bathroom and pulled back the curtain. Whitney let out a squeal of surprise and covered herself the best she could with her arms. "What are you doing?" She yelled at him.

He stood there not knowing what to say. Then he gathered his thoughts. "You weren't answering me and I thought maybe you had fallen and hit your head or something." She ripped the shower curtain out of his hands and covered herself with it. He rolled his eyes. "It's not like you have anything I have never seen before." She glared at him.

"Yes because that makes me feel so much better." She snapped.

He looked her in the eyes and then pried the shower curtain out of her hands. "You have nothing to hide." He told stepping into the shower with her. He realized it probably was not such a good idea seeing as he was still fully clothed.

"John ... I" But he placed two fingers over her mouth to stop her.

"There is nothing about you that would make me want you less. Ok well if you were actually a guy ... but that is the only thing." He sidetracked. "I think it is time you stopped using your scar as a way to keep people at arms length. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her body against his in an embrace. He let out a groan.

"What?" She asked looking up at him concerned.

"You are naked." He pointed out the obvious. The understanding could be seen in her eyes. There was still a little bit of apprehension in them but she nodded.

"Maybe you are right. Maybe I need to start living my life fully again." She agreed with him. "Maybe I should kiss you right now."

He couldn't believe it but he actually felt a little nervous about this. "Y... yea maybe you should." John swallowed hard before Whitney's lips touched his. He was done. The apprehension was gone and he was now dying to get out of his drenched clothes. She slid her hand down his chest to the bottom of his shirt and helped him take it off. She had obviously seen him with his shirt off hundreds of times but this time felt different. He began kissing her again. His mouth felt hot against hers. Her hands at the base of his neck pulling him deeper into the kiss. She bit down on his lower lip and he found himself going even more crazy then he had previous been. His mouth left hers and traveled lower.

Before she could make a counter move, his hot mouth latched to her nipple, taking it all in. His tongue swirled around the now hard piece of tissue. The feeling of his mouth on her skin gave her goose bumps under the hot water. The feel of his other hand running down her side, gripping at her waist made her breath catch and her stomach flip.

His hand slowly followed the curve of the hip, moving along the bottom of her ass cheek. He felt her trembling under his touch and it only made him ache for her more. He then ran his hand along the back of her leg, barely touching the sensitive area on her inner thigh, just enough to get things going and drive her wild. Then he ran his fingers from her pussy to the back of her knee intensifying the goose bumps. He was teasing her, she knew that much but she liked it. In her head she began to imagine the things she wanted to do to him.

Coming back up her leg he gently ran his fingers over her pussy lips lingering just enough on her clit to drive her insane. Before continuing up along her abdomen between her breasts where she caught his fingers with her mouth. She sucked on his index and middle fingers, flicking her tongue all around the tips of his fingers sending him into a lustful fit. Whitney reached into his pants and looks him in the eyes as she begins stroking his unit while sucking his fingers, she can feel it stiffen like a steel rod.

She asked him "When was the last time you used this."

"I cannot remember." He admits. Then he begins to feel a little ashamed. She can see it in his eyes. She didn't have to be a mind reader to know what he was thinking. She removed her hand from his shaft and placed it against his chest.

"I wasn't your fault. Things happen, sometimes shitty things happen and it is unfair and you can sit around and feel sorry for yourself or you can sit back and enjoy that you still get to feel things like happiness and pleasure."

He nodded, he knew she was right. She looked at him again. "Do you want me to stop?" She asked.

"Umm ... no." He gave her a funny look. She laughed and continued to enjoy torturing him. This time she was a little rougher. He threw his head back and couldn't help but think that he just might climax right there in her hand.

His breathing began to accelerate and he knew he was close to climaxing. Whitney stopped pleasuring him with her hand and shut the water off. John opened his eyes almost shocked. She grabbed him by his belt loop and then lead him out of the shower and back into the bedroom. John grinned as she told him to strip down.

Once he was out of his wet clothes he felt on top of the world. She eyed him lustfully. This was the first time she had ever seen him fully naked. She told him to lay down on the bed. He cocked his eyebrow and decided that he liked this side of her.

"I think your going to enjoy this as much as I am" She told him as she took the tip of his throbbing member into her mouth and slowly ran her tongue around the ridge of his head. He laid his head back on the pillow and took a deep breath exhaling slowly. She then took her tongue and ran it the length of the bottom of his cock and began to insert it again into her mouth, this time taking him whole. She paused again on the tip and stroked the rest with both hands, quickening the pace and intensifying the attention she was paying to running her tongue over his head.

He gently bucked his hips and told her he was about to cum. She again raised the pace at which she was working his now throbbing unit until he let his load loose into her mouth.

She sat back and swallowed his spunk with a grin. The taste brought her back and she got even more turned on. He embraced her and picked her up placing her on the bed on her back. He laid beside her again taking her nipple into her mouth gently flicking his tongue on the nipple while running his fingers over her areola with his saliva still on her nipple, he took his fingers and gently rubbed her nipple till they are both hard. He ran his fingers between her breasts and worked his way to her stomach pausing and starting to cause goose bumps to come in waves. He traced her navel with his finger then kissed it.

He moved his hand to her now wet pussy and ran his fingers over her lips giving her the most intense feelings she had in a long time. He separated her lip exposing her clit which he worked with his thumb and index finger, making her moan loud enough to wake the dead. John teased her till she began to pant and groan. He took his index finger and glides it into her, sliding it past her g-spot, triggering her first orgasm. While she is bucking and moaning he started working her g-spot with his middle finger, while sucking on her clit and keeping her orgasm rolling.

While Whitney is still writhing in ecstasy. "Fuck me." She begged.

He moved up the bed and positioned his erect member in front of her quivering pussy; he spread her legs with his knee and inserted himself into her. He slowly plunged his cock into her and began to slowly move in and out. Feeling her tightening as he quickened the trusting. She dug her nails into his back a little too hard and he could feel a few trickles of blood. Wounds that he would wear with honor.

He rolled her over to penetrate her from behind, with every thrust he hit her g-spot sending her into a whole new plateau of ecstasy. As he felt the first waves of climax washing over him his strokes became harder and faster.

John traced shapes on her side as they both relaxed after a round of love making. "So how long has it been for you?" he asked her.

"I'd say about two and a half years." She replied truthfully.

"How the hell did you manage that?" He asked a little baffled. Sure he had gone without for a little over a year but he could never imagine going without for over two years.

"Well I got sick and then I got really sick and when you are that sick and in that much pain you really do not want to be intimate with anyone and then I woke up and they told me that I had a new heart and I had this horrible inflamed stitched up hole on my body and I hated it. I hated that there was a part of me people would stare at or pity me for so I was just like whatever I do not need sex. But then you came along with your sexy brooding outer layer and your heart of gold inside." She smiled at him. He brought his hand up to stroke the side of her face.

"I think I might love you Whitney." He said in a soft relaxed tone.

"I think I might love you too."


	16. Chapter 16

_It's 4:03 and I can't sleep__  
__Without you next to me I__  
__Toss and turn like the sea__  
__If I drown tonight, bring me__  
__Back to life__  
__Breathe your breath in me__  
__The only thing that I still believe__  
__In is you, if you only knew_

"Ah, it is so good to be home." John breathed a deep sigh of relief as he removed his keys from the lock and stepped over the threshold into his home. Whitney followed behind him in a state of awe. She had never seen a house this big in her life. Mind you that she came from a home with a single mother who worked at one point three jobs to make sure that Whitney had everything she needed.

John took a moment to look over his shoulder at Whitney, who as before mentioned was still stunned. "What do you think?"

"It's nice, huge and kinda ostentatious, but nice."

"Would you like a tour?" He asked extending his hand to her.

"Sure, but if we get to the bedroom and you go this is where the magic happens I will pop you one." She laughed.

_Mental note to self ... no this is where the magic happens. She knows me so well by now. I dunno if I like that or not._

"Well this is the living room with the fireplace that I plan on making love with you in front of." He smirked. She had said no this is where the magic happens. She never said that he could not tell her what he planned on doing with her. She blushed slightly and he wrapped an arm around her as he continued to show her around.

"You look tired babe." John said kissing her temple.

"Jet-lag." She sighed before yawning.

"How about you take a nap in my bed while I take a shower." He suggested. "I swear the sheets have never even been slept on."

"I wasn't gonna ask." She stuck her tongue out at him and he led her to his bedroom. The room was huge but very warm and inviting. In the center of the room was a spacious looking king sized bed. The moment she saw it she wanted nothing more than to climb in and sleep for three days.

John watched as she removed her shirt and her pants and climbed into his bed wearing simply a pair of boy shorts and a bra. The feeling of knowing he had someone sleeping with him in his bed again made him feel all warm inside.

He left her to sleep as he went to take a nice hot shower. That is what he needed to sooth his sore muscles. He wasn't sure why he bothered because he just planned on aggravating them again later on with what he had planned. But when the hot water hit his body he planned on thoroughly enjoying his shower.

After about thirty minutes of simply standing under the water it started to get cold. He shut off the water and grabbed his towel. After toweling himself off he threw the towel into the hamper and ventured back out to his bedroom. Whitney was now sound asleep. He decided that he was a little tired and climbed into bed next to her. She sighed and snuggled into his warmth.

"You smell good." He wasn't sure if she was actually talking to him or talking in her sleep. But either way he would take the complement.

--

Whitney woke up later feeling so much better. John was passed out next to her with his arm over his face. She laughed a little at him before leaning over to kiss his eyelids.

"Hmm." He mumbled sleepily. "Kiss a little lower." There was a tired smirk across his face. She kissed his lips. "Lower."

"Perv." She whacked him on his chest.

"That's me showing affection." He nuzzled her neck. Leaving a trail of light kisses in his wake.

"No, that's you wanting some oral satisfaction." She contradicted him.

"Sex is how guys express love."

"Untrue. That is the statement that guys tell women when they get mad at them for being horndogs." She had a point and they both knew it.

He yawned. "Well whatever I am the one who is gonna take a nap now." She snuggled closer to him and he let out a content sigh.

--

John woke up some time later. The bed seemed a little colder to him, which had woken him up. He opened his eyes and went to turn over to greet his girlfriend. Frowning, he realized that she was not there next to him. He got out of bed and slowly made his way to the first floor. He could hear music coming from the kitchen. There stood his girlfriend with patches of flour covered in various places.

"Hey." She grinned at him.

"Hun ... whatcha doin?" He asked.

"Makin breakfast for dinner." Her grin grew bigger as she placed a plate full of breakfast foods before him. "I know you love breakfast foods so I decided what the hell. I was stirring pancake batter when I met your cat. He decided that he wanted some batter and he kinda scared me by appearing the way he did. I was startled and ended up hitting myself in the face with the damn spoon."

"Hey Stinky" The cat walked across the counter and made himself comfortable in his master's lap.

"Stinky huh?" She asked with a laugh.

John shrugged as he popped a piece of bacon into his mouth. "Came with the name."

"Ah." She placed a steaming mug of black coffee next to his plate."

She sat in the vacant seat next to him and started to dig into her plate as well. Mindless chatter and reminiscing about their vacation together is what occupied the conversation during their meal. Within no time, their plates were clean and Whitney was clearing the table.

"Here, let me." John offered. "You cooked. I'll clean."

Whitney smiled. "Well in that case, I guess I'll go shower real quick." She kissed him tenderly on his lips and headed for the bedroom.

"Whit!" John called out quickly.

"Yeah?" Whitney asked poking her head back into the kitchen.

"After I'm done here, did you want to watch a movie?" He asked as he scrubbed at the plates.

"Yeah." Whit winked and left again.

Whistling a tune he set to work on the task at hand. He finished around the same time Whitney emerged from the bathroom. She learned over the banister. "John!" she yelled.

"What?" was his reply.

"You mind if I use your computer to see if Vince emailed me your return to work schedule. My blackberry is dead and I do not feel like looking for the charger."

"Go for it! The office is the room next to the master bedroom." He yelled back up to her.

"Alrighty"

She dressed quickly and ran her hand through her damp hair. Her bare feet tread across the soft carpet of the upstairs hall. She placed a hand on the doorknob and opened it. The room was spacious and tidy except for the desk. Whoever was collecting John's mail had just slung it on the desk. She turned the computer on and decided to tidy up the desk. She was almost finished with her task when her hands felt a particularly stiff envelope. She moved some mail aside and picked up the piece of postage in question. Tears sprang to her eyes. She knew this letter. She had written it.

John was wondering what had been taking Whitney so long, so he grabbed two DVD choices and headed to his office. Her back was to him when he opened the door. "Whit?" He said softly. She turned to look at him, tears streaming down her face.

"Baby what's the matter?" John dropped the DVDs on the desk and looked at what she was holding. "What are you doing with that?"

"I wrote this." Whitney barely whispered.

"What are you talking about?" John asked.

"I wrote this to my donor's fiancée." Whitney broke down.

"Wait ... are you trying to tell me that you have Mia's heart?" He turned away from her and ran a hand through his hair. She went to place her hand on his shoulder but he ripped it from her grasp the moment her hand made contact. "Is that why you are here? You thought you would play head games with the poor bastard that lost the woman he loved?" His eyes turned cold and accusing.

"What? No ... I didn't even know until I picked up the letter. All the donor stuff is kept confidential. They do not tell you." She tried to explain.

"and you expect me to believe that?" John looked at her like she was lower than bile.

"John, I'm telling you the truth. Donors are kept completely confidential to the recipient."

"Then what about the letter? How'd you write it to me?" His temper was flaring and he was more hurt than angry at this point and he didn't want to believe her. "I ... I think you should leave." He tried to make sure that his voice did not crack as he was saying this. His heart was breaking all over again.

"You are kicking me out over something I had no control over." She placed her hand on her hips. "So what now ... according to you I am some user who targets men who are going through the worst time of their lives. And somehow Mia's death is my fault ... huh? Did I put the liquor in your hands? Was I the one who told you to drive that night?" He grabbed her arm forcefully. It was like the first time she met him all over again. His eyes had that same dead quality. She would be the first to admit that she was a little afraid.

"I said leave." He let go of her arm and she stumbled back into the desk. Shaking her head she turned around and left the room. Stopping at the doorway to take one last look at him.

"I am not coming back this time. As of right now I quit. Have a nice life." She packed up her stuff and called a cab. He heard her slam his front door and after that he collapsed into the computer chair. He no longer had the strength to stand. For a long while after that he just cried. He just cried until there were no more tears that his body could shed. He looked at the envelope still lying on the desk. He picked it up and crumpled it and threw it across the room. But then he got up and went to retrieve it. He ripped the envelope a little more forcefully than he would normally do, tearing it's contents in half. The envelope fell to the floor and with shaking hands he held the torn pages of the letter Whitney had unknowingly written him.

_To Whom It May Concern:_

_I can never thank your fiancée enough for saving my life. I was literally in death's arms when by some miracle I lived. But in order for me to live the person you love needed to die. For that I am truly sorry. Words would never be enough to express my gratitude to the both of you. I was twenty-three, not even in my prime yet when I received the news that without a new heart I would die. I had convinced myself that that was just my fate. I would die before I even had really started to live. But because of you and your fiancée I am now able to feel the sunlight on my face again. I know that means little or nothing to you but it takes dying to realize that the little things do matter. __Again, I don't know how I became the lucky recipient of your fiancée's heart, and I know that I'll never know how, but, I'm deeply sorry for your loss. Words cannot describe how thankful I am. Maybe one day our paths will cross, and then again maybe one day they won't. So thank you, God Bless you and I will forever be eternally grateful._

_Whitney Langston_

John began to cry again. Why did life have to be so unfair? Why did his new girlfriend ... well ex-girlfriend now thanks to him have to have Mia's heart? Was he really all that bothered by the fact? So many questions and no answers. The one thing he was certain of was Mickie was going to rip him a new one.


	17. Chapter 17

_Another shot of whiskey can't stop looking at the door__  
__Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before.__  
__And I wonder if I ever cross your mind__  
__for me it happens all the time.__  
_

John had come to the conclusion that his life was just one big suck-parade. It was his first day back to work he had to job to The Miz. Oh yes and his girlfriend left him. Could his life get any worse?

"John Felix Anthony Cena!" Mickie barged into his locker room. Apparently his life could in fact get much worse. And it had. Mickie stood scowling at him. "What the hell is wrong with you?" Mickie fumed. "I have the right mind to put you into the damn hospital myself!"

"Mickie I do not have the energy to fight with you right now." John stood from his seat. Trying to make his way to the bathroom. There was no particular reason for him to go into the bathroom, he simply just wanted to get away from Mickie.

"I do not think so! You do not get to walk away from me like that!" She grabbed his arm and held it tightly. He winced a little and knew there was no escape. He sighed and claimed the seat he had been sitting in once again. He pinched the bridge of his nose in hopes to stop the headache he felt coming on. He doubted it would work though.

"What do you want from me?" John asked annoyed.

"Gee ... I dunno ... how about you tell me why you threw away the one thing that you actually had going for you since Mia died." Mickie placed her hands on her hips.

"She has Mia's heart Mick." John admitted. Mickie seemed unphased by the sudden bombshell he thought he had laid out on her. His eyes turned cold. "You knew?"

"Of course I knew. I am all seeing and all knowing." She scoffed. She thought he would have known this by now.

"She tell you?" He asked bitterly.

"She had no idea whose heart she got." A light bulb went off inside Mickie's brain. He thought she knew. "You are a complete and total moron."

John looked at her shocked. How could she possibly come to that conclusion? Mickie began to pace.

"Now tell me ... are all men this stupid or is it just you? An organ recipient has no idea where their organ is coming from. It is part of the whole patient confidentiality act that hospitals and doctor's offices have. All they are given is an address where they can send a letter to the donor's family."

"When did you become such an expert on organ transplants?" John asked.

"Well after I found out about Whitney's heart I began researching organ transplants and the procedures that go into it." She stopped pacing and looked at John. "I started asking Whitney questions after that. Like what hospital she was at and the day she received her heart. After she answered the questions I realized that she got her heart just hours after Mia passed away. I thought that it was too big of a coincidence so I had Mike Mizanin hack into Mia's records and that is when I found out that Whit had Mia's heart."

"Why didn't you tell me?" John asked.

"Because it was something you needed to hear from her or never know for this reason exactly." Mickie said pointing at him, an indication of his behavior and the reason why Whitney had left. "She didn't know until she found the letter that it was you. I didn't even tell her."

"You are supposed to be my best friend how could you keep something like that from me?" John asked. He was so hurt that she would keep something so important like this from him.

"Would you have really wanted to know? Knowing what you now know wouldn't you rather just go back in time and just enjoy the fact that someone other than Mia made you feel alive again after a year of being dead to the world?"

John was at a loss for words. What Mickie was saying made sense, but he couldn't wrap his head around the fact that she was right. "I'm scared again for the first time in my life and I don't know what to do."

Mickie watched as fear became evident in John's eyes. "John, this is something of a higher power than anyone has. It's fate John. It's the universe working in its way to make things right. Whitney is your new Mia. I've never seen you so happy before. Not since she died John."

"It's not the same." He continued to argue.

"John." Mickie sighed. "You have been given a second chance. You and I both know that Mia would not want you to be alone. So stop being a total jackass and go and apologize to Whit. She's hurting just as much as you are."

"I dunno if I can Mick." John admitted. "What if something happens and I lose her too?"

"Well I guess the question you have to ask yourself is would you rather take the chance and get hurt or feel nothing at all?" She left him to think about that.

--

_It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now__  
__Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now__  
__And I don't know how I can do without__  
__I just need you now_

He looked once again at the digital clock on his bedside table. It was a quarter after one and he hated that he was all alone. The sheets weren't as warm to him as they had been when he was sharing them with Whitney.

He had given up on sleep by this point. After three days on constant tossing and turning he knew that sleep wasn't an option. Everything on television sucked. So he just laid there staring at the ceiling. So now he was heart-broken, sleep deprived, and bored. Lovely.

But at least he had his good friend Jack Daniels with him. A full bottle and nobody around to share it with. He felt a twinge in his heart. He was breaking the promise he made to her. But in his defense she had left him. She was not here to make him feel alive. So why shouldn't he drink? There was no reason not to.

He said he wanted nothing to do with her. He knew he shouldn't call her but he needed her. If he couldn't have her beside him then at least he could hear her voice. He dialed her number and heard ringing.

--

She looked at her caller id. It was him, she debated whether she wanted to answer or not but decided it was a bad idea and let it go to voicemail. It began to ring again and she let her tears fall.

--

He had given up at trying to get her to answer the phone so he decided to leave her a voice message. He swallowed hard when he heard the beep and paused for a few seconds to decide what he wanted to say.

He looked at the almost empty bottle of whiskey next to him. Had that really been full just a mere thirty minutes ago? He cannot remember it if was. He knew she was going to be mad that he broke his promise. But at that moment he did not care.

"_Hey it's me. I know it's late and you probably want nothing to do with me. But I am a little drunk and I have lost all self control at this point. I miss you and I need you more than I have needed anything else in my life. I'm sorry. I just freaked out after learning that you have Mia's heart. I know now that you had no idea and were probably just as freaked out as I was. Please just call me back and let me hear your voice. I'm sorry and I love you."_

--

She listened to his voicemail and then deleted it. She'd rather feel nothing then hurt at the moment. She wasn't sure if she wanted to forgive him, or even want to be with the man who's partner had so generously given her a second chance at life. She needed to do a lot of soul searching before she could reach out to John again.


	18. Chapter 18

_Yeah, it's plain to see __  
__that baby you're beautiful__  
__And it's nothing wrong with you__  
__It's me, I'm a freak __  
__but thanks for lovin' me__  
__Cause you're doing it perfectly__  
_

She stood stocking shelves. It' had been a long day and all she wanted to do was go home and sleep for the next three days. Tomorrow was the first day off she had in three weeks and she is going to spend the whole day in bed.

Whitney turned her head to look at Sean. He was standing behind the counter with a Pez dispenser in his hands. He was shooting the little yellow candies into his mouth one at a time. Sometimes it was hard for Whitney to look at him. He shared some of his brother's features but they also looked completely different so it wasn't as much that aspect. It was more of the fact that she knew they were brothers.

Sean gave her a curious look, the same one he often gave her when he noticed the same sad look that she often wore. When she had come back to town and started working with him he had obviously known that something had happened but neither person it involved seemed to want to fill him in on what had happened.

"You excited for tomorrow?" Sean asked. He figured it was a safe subject. Their conversations had become more superficial. Instead of talking about everything as they once had it was mainly work conversations now. He had asked her a few times about his brother and what had happened but she never told him and it wasn't worth the emotional whiplash he would receive afterwards.

"Yea." She replied quietly as she placed the last product on the shelf it belonged. She slowly walked over to the counter and slumped over.

"Wanna Pez?" Sean asked. She nodded and opened up her mouth. With perfect aim he shot a candy into her open mouth. She gave him a small smile as she started to chew. She thanked whatever higher power that she had Sean in her life. He was the best medicine she could have ever received. He had a way of making her laugh even on her most shitty days. It was nice to know that even though she felt like her heart, the heart that she now felt she had stolen from Mia, was going to just break and give out at any moment.

Sometimes she wondered what would happen if she just stopped taking all her medication. It had been more than a year now since she had the transplant. Would her body really reject something that had been inside her body for so long now? Part of her wanted her body to reject the heart. The other, more rational part of her knew that she was just hurting after the "break up" and that these thoughts were crazy. Was it even really a break up? She replied the hurtful events over in her mind. Yep, it definitely was a break up.

"Maybe you should cut out early." Sean suggested moving some hair behind her ear. She straightened up and looked him in the eyes. How could she never have noticed how stunning his eyes were? She bit down on her lower lip. Wanting to do something she knew was wrong. But at that point she did not care. She grabbed both sides of Sean's face and fiercely kissed him.

Sean was taken aback at first but being a guy it did not take him long to catch up. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her as close as he could to deepen the kiss. But then his rational side kicked in and he broke apart from her.

"Whoa ... what the hell was that?" He asked red-faced and breathless.

--

He had his hand on the door handle. Unseen by the occupants inside. His knuckle turn white from his tight grip. He wondered how much force he would have to use to break the solid steel handle. Shaking his head he simply just turns walks away.

--

"Sorry ... I ... I just got a little carried away." She apologized. She had no idea now as to why she decided to kiss Sean. Maybe it was just so that she could say she did. Maybe she was just hurting and he had always been the one there for her. Who knows, she sure didn't.

"You love my brother. Whatever you two went through I can tell you still love him and I know he still loves you. Remember I told you about the hard exterior he shows the rest of the world? Well you made him loose it. But now he had it back, now I am not gonna ask what happened between you two but I think you should at least try talking to him."

"You are right." He smiled thinking he had gotten through to her. "I should cut out early. Night Sean." With that she turned away from him and hung up her apron. She was out the door only moments later with no other words.

--

John sat on his father's living room couch. His head was in his hands, he felt heartbroken and betrayed. Of all the people Whitney had to choose from why did it have to be his brother? Was there something there all along and he was just too blind to see it?

His father sat in a nearby chair watching the very last Conan O'Brien show. He still felt a little bitterness towards Jay Leno for that one. His attention perked up as he heard that Will Farrell was going to be a part of the show. Will Farrell after all was one of his favorite ... if not his absolute favorite actor.

They began playing Lynyard Skynard's "Freebird". John's face turned sour, he hated that song. He stood from his seat and walked swiftly over towards the television and turned it off.

"Hey I was watching that!" Johnny Fabulous cried in outrage.

"I hate that song ..." John grumbled.

"But Max was playing." Fabo continued to argue.

"So go see a damn Springsteen concert." John argued back.

"What the hell is the matter with you John?" Normally Fabo was one to stay out of his children's personal lives but he could see that something was bothering his second eldest son.

John opened his mouth to speak when the traitorous brother in question walked into the house. He wore a smile on his face and seemed excited to see John,

"Hey bro, what brings you here?" Sean asked good-naturedly.

John stood up and Sean assumed that he wanted to hug him so he extended his arms only to get punched in the face.

Sean held the side of his face where his brother punched him, he was in total shock. John had never hit him like that before. Even Fabo was frozen in his Laz-E-Boy.

"What the hell man?" Sean used all his strength to shove his wall of a brother a few inches.

"How long have you been sleeping with her Sean?" John accused shoving his brother.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Sean countered shoving his brother back.

"you sleeping with Whitney!" He pictured the kiss in his mind and just lost it. He slammed Sean hard against the living room wall. The shelves filled with picutres and other little trinkets rattled with the force. John's huge arm pressed itself hard against Sean's windpipe.

"D... dad ... h ... help." Sean's face was rapidly turning purple in color.

"John ..." Fabo's voice boomed from behind the two brothers. John loosened his grip.

"Sean is it true. Are you sleeping with your brother's girlfriend?" Fabo asked but he did not like having to let those words come out of his mouth. It left a bad taste in his mouth.

"First of all she is his ex-girlfriend and of course not. Whitney is my friend and I have nothing but friendly feelings towards her."

"Liar!" John yelled raising his hand to punch Sean in the face again. "I saw you kiss her."

"She kissed me!" Sean yelled before closing his eyes and preparing for a punch that never came.

John dropped his arm from Sean's neck and stumbled back over to the couch. Sean shot his father an annoyed look before going over and sitting on the coffee table in front of his older brother.

"She kissed me." He admitted again. "She is so hurt by whatever happened with you two that she kissed me just to try and ease the pain."

"Get away from me!" John shouted before standing up and grabbing his coat.

"John you are not going anywhere." Fabo placed his hand on John's arm to stop him.

"Get off of me old man." John spat wrenching his hand from out of his father's grip. "Everyone just leave me alone!" He slammed the front door behind him so hard Fabo believed that the glass on them was going to shatter.

"Dad I have Danny on the phone. He is gonna keep an eye out for John." Sean placed a hand on his father's shoulder. "He just needs some time to vent."

"What happened between those two?" Fabo asked.

"I have no idea neither will talk about it." Sean shrugged. "Must be something big though."

--

It was the next say and Whitney was pissed at Sean for not coming to work. Her mother asked her to come in to work for him. So much for her day off. Whitney was just helping her mother close up the grocery store for the night when her cell phone rang. She looked at the caller ID. 'Sean Cena'

"Hmm." Whitney hummed aloud. "Hey Sean I am totally pissed at you for not working today."

"Whit." He replied solemnly.

"Sean, I know that tone. What's the matter?" Whitney asked slightly concerned. Sean never called her regarding "sad" issues.

"There's been an accident." He answered.

Immediately Whitney's heart dropped to her stomach. "W...wh...what?" She knew it was about John, just by gut instinct and reaction.

Sean spent the next short five minutes detailing what little he knew about John's accident and what his outlook and condition was right now.

"I...I, uh, I'm on my way." Whitney was already to her car with the store locked up by the time Sean finished his story.

--

Everything was foggy. His arms and legs felt heavy and if he tried to turn his head he couldn't.

"He's waking up." He heard whispers. He tried to find the voice for he couldn't clearly recognize it. All he knew was that it was a female.

Whitney stood from her chair across the room as Mickie took John's hand in hers. The Cena men and their wives or girlfriends were downstairs getting something to eat.

John tried to focus on the body in front of him. But it did him no good. He closed his eyes and waited a moment while the blur disappeared. He was on enough medications to probably sedate a horse. He totaled his rental car and practically tore himself in half.

His pelvis was broken, his ankle shattered and his concussion was very severe. He had lacerations on his liver and he was lucky that the impact didn't make his lungs explode. He was severely dehydrated due to the amount of alcohol in his system at the time of the accident.

At some point during his stint in the ER, he had attempted to pull his IV out and that's why he felt as if he could barely move his arms. Not to mention his neck was in a brace as a precaution due to his previous neck surgery.

He pulled harder against the restraints. "John ... stop that." He recognized Mickie's voice instantly. He felt her tiny hand caress his forehead.

"Mickie ... marry me." Both girls looked at each other with confusion.


	19. Chapter 19

_He pulled harder against the restraints. "John ... stop that." He recognized Mickie's voice instantly. He felt her tiny hand caress his forehead. _

_"Mickie ... marry me." Both girls looked at each other with confusion. _

"John please be careful." Whitney pleaded with the hard-headed man as he walked through his front door on crutches. Three months after a horrific car accident that left more of his body broken thatn not he had been discharged from the hospital.

"I know what I am doing woman." He huffed at her.

She crossed her arms over her chest and tapped her foot against the floor. "Ok then you

asshole. Fall."

"I am not going to fall." No sooner did he say that did he trip over the corner of an area rug and stumble. He managed to catch himself. She was at his side instantly.

"Just let me help you!" She exclaimed at him.

"Fine." He backed down. She left one crutch in the hall and he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, using one crutch to steady himself, together they made it over to the couch.

"See now was that so hard?" she asked.

"If you are going to be nasty to me then leave." He shot back at her.

"Ha." She laughed in his face. "Nobody else wants to take care of you. So it's either you cooperate and let me help you or you'll end up starving to death."

He would not admit it to her but he was glad she was with him. She certainly did not have to be but there she was fussing over him and making sure he was alright.

"So do you want to talk about the whole you having Mia's heart thing?" he asked.

"There is nothing to say John. If I could bring her back I would. I should have died. She shoulda lived. Believe me I know."

"Whit, it's not like that at all.

"Then what is it like John? Because I have no idea anymore." She pulled at her hair in frustration.

"I love you Whitney." She stopped in her tracks. That was the first time he had said it to her. Sure he had told her he thought he was in love with her but he had never said those three little words, those words that every girl wanted to hear.

She kept her back to him but he could see her shaking. He frowned, he could not understand why she was so mad at him. He carefully stood and turned her around. She wasn't shaking with rage, she was crying.

"Whit, what's the matter?" He asked. Concern etched across his beautifully masculine features.

"I love you too." She sobbed.

He laughed then. "So why are you crying?"

"Because that is the first time you said that to me and what with you being so critical for such a long time I am finally letting all my emotions out. I am on overload."

"You are such a dork. Come here." He pulled her into as tight of a hug as he could with his crutches.

She could not believe that a whole year had passed since John's horrible accident. She had been so worried that he would die. But yet there he was in the middle of a game of darts with Sean. Both Cena men laughing and enjoying every moment of being alive.

"Come one Whit one drink" Mickie urged her. "We are celebrating."

Whitney laughed. "I can celebrate without drinking that poison."

"But I am getting married tomorrow."

"Mick, don't you think we spend enough time in the Emergency room?" Whitney pointed out.

"You do make a valid argument." Mickie agreed.

"Besides see that guy over there?" Whitney pointed to John. "I wanna grow old with that man and that cannot happen if my body rejects my heart."

"Fine." Mickie pretended that she had just given up some huge sacrifice. "Besides if you got sick who would be my maid of honor tomorrow?"

"I have no idea." Whitney rolled her eyes. "I'll be right back. Gonna go use the ladies' room."

"Try not to have too much fun in there." Mickie hollered as she walked off.

"Hey where'd Whit go?" John asked wrapping his arm around Mickie's shoulders.

"She went to the bathroom." Mickie explained.

"So how does it feel knowing that at this time tomorrow you will be a married woman?" John asked. He was so happy that Mickie and Sean were getting married the following day. Although he would be the first to admit that when they first started dating, right after he had the accident, he did not think that it would last but here they were one year later about to take the ultimate leap. He for one could not be any more excited for the happy couple.

"There's my girl." John enveloped his girlfriend in a huge hug when she returned to the small group.

"Did you miss me that much?" She asked with a laugh.

"Not really. Just kinda wanted a hug."

"Ass." She remarked.

Her attention turned to a familiar song that began playing from the jukebox. "Oh my god I love this song!" She began to sing along.

John momentarily felt like someone had punched him in the heart. This was Mia's favorite song. Mickie gave him a look before beginning to rub his back. Mickie knew that things like this were still hard for her friend. Loosing someone you love is never something you just get over. But as he was learning it gets easier over time. He gave the diva a smile.

By this time Whitney had gotten Sean to sing along with her. Mickie laughed and began singing along as well. With a deep breath he too began to sing rather drunkenly and off-key to a song that no longer haunted him when he heard it.

_"We were strangers many hours and I missed you for so long. When we were lions, lovers in combat. Faded like your name on those jeans that I burned."_ They all sang in unison.

–

"Babe." John gently shook his girlfriend awake.

"John, what time is it?" She asked yawning. "Did I oversleep?"

"No honey. It's still really early." He stroked the soft skin of her cheek.

"Then why'd you wake me up?" She asked a little miffed at being awoken way before she should have been.

"Since we are back home I wanted to take you somewhere."

"John." She sighed. "I wanna sleep."

"Please Whit. This is really important to me." He begged her. She groaned as she threw the covers off of herself. She knew this must be really important if he was begging her.

She dressed and followed him out to the car. She got into the driver's seat and closed her eyes, intending to go back to sleep. The ride took a little over twenty minutes. John shook her awake again before getting out of the car.

"A cemetery? You brought me to a cemetery?" She yelled at him. "It's five-thirty in the god damn morning and this is where you bring me."

He knew her well enough to not take her screaming at him to heart. She just really hated being woken up before she had to be. With a loud sigh she began following him. A blue jay flying above them caught her eye and she almost collided with her boyfriend as he stopped short.

She came to stand next to him. She had no idea why they were there or what John was looking at. Her eyes took in the headstone that John was staring at. She felt her heart strings tightening. He had taken her to Mia's grave. As far as she knew he never went to Mia's grave. So to bring her here made her love him even more.

He stood there awkwardly with his hands in his pockets. He wasn't sure what to do or say. Or even if he was actually supposed to say something. Whitney wrapped her arms around his waist in support.

"It's ok to talk to her you know." She told him.

"I just don't know what to say."

"Tell her about your life now. Tell her how much you miss her. You can tell her anything you want to. That is what coming to visit people who have passed is about. This is a place where you can come and remember Mia and talk to her."

"It's just so surreal. I never wanted to come here because I figured that if I saw the headstone I would really have to accept that she was gone. I always knew that she was of course but I just did not want to believe it."

"So what changed now?" She asked curious.

"You." He replied honestly. "You made it not hurt so much. I know what happened was a horrible accident but being with you has made me realize that I do not need to be haunted by what happened. Part of me will always feel like her death is my fault, that will never change but I can get up in the morning and say to myself that Mia would want me to live. I can now see that she would not blame me for what happened and would not want me to be crippled by guilt and grief."

"Well I for one would like to say thank you to you Mia. You gave me a second chance at life and I do not intend to waste even one second of it. I also promise you that I will make sure he doesn't either." She gave him a light squeeze. "I think I am gonna head to the car. I am sure there is some stuff that you would want to tell her in private." She kissed his cheek before walking away.

John bit the his lower lip. He was alone now. He crouched down to touch the stone. "I guess I just want to tell you that I think about you everyday and I am so sorry for what happened to you. After you died I felt so guilty. I convinced myself that it was my fault and that if I hadn't had that beer that I would have been able to know that light was red. I also thought that it should have been me and not you. But you wouldn't have wanted me to think like that. But then Whitney walked into my life and changed everything. I have a feeling that you sent her to me. You saved her life and somehow in the process saved mine as well. I intend to spend the rest of my life with her. I will make her happy like I should have made you. I will always love you Mia but I will always love her too. Love is crazy that way." He couldn't think of anything else to say so he kissed her tombstone before saying goodbye and walking away.

"I'm so proud of you. That was probably really hard for you."

"I'm glad I did it." He admitted. "Now if we get home quickly we can still get another two hours of sleep."

"Sounds heavenly." She gave him a smile.

"What a lovely wedding." Whitney remarked as she swayed with the man she loved.

"Give you any ideas?" John asked.

She laughed. "Marry you? Never."

He frowned. Until she gave him a huge smile. "Try asking me and maybe you'll like the answer."

He smiled before bringing his lips down to meet hers. "Oh you'll marry me someday. I can feel it in my bones."

"Let's get through one wedding before planning another. Right now I just want to spend the rest of the night in your arms."

"Yes ma'am."

"Hey Mia." John knelt down onto the cold snow covered ground. This had been the first time he had been there alone since the three years that she was buried that he had come to visit her grave. He had come a few times with Whitney but on this occasion he decided to come on his own. His fingers traced over her name. He was nervous coming here today. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself. "No Whit today. I needed to talk to you about something that I don't want her to know about just yet. You see I am gonna propose to her tonight. I know it's only been a few months since Sean and Mickie were married and I really should wait a little longer but I honestly do not want to. I really want to marry her. But I guess I felt like I should talk it over with you first." He laughed a little. "You are probably screaming at me up there. I can hear you now. _You moron why are sitting there talking to my stone for? Go ask that girl to marry you! _I guess I just needed the peace of mind of coming here and talking to you about it. You don't think I am rushing do you?" As he asked the question a bitter cold burst of wind whipped at his face. "I get the point. I am leaving." He laughed again and with a gentle smile said, "Thanks Mia." John walked away feeling more alive than he had in years, and he had one loss with heartful gain to thank for it.


End file.
